KIM SEMETIS: “Empaths And Codependency — Signs That You May Be A Codependent Empath”

As empaths we are healers to the very core of our soul. The lines may get a little fuzzy as we want to heal and please those close to us in our lives (we are BORN this way so it starts real early, even though we may not realize that we are healers for many, many years).

The ones we love are of a major concern. We want to heal them and it seems that we can never turn this off. We want them to be happy and be healed because WE CARE SO MUCH not only about them but about all living things. This can and usually does turn us unwittingly into co–dependents. Please bear with me as I give the definition of both.

Empath — Someone who is hypersensitive to their surroundings and the thoughts, feelings and emotions of those around them. They can feel the energy of people and places to the extreme. They have the gift of claircognizance, meaning they just know things. If someone is lying to them they will just know it. They came here to heal the world. Just by being in and around an empath other souls are being healed on many levels (body, mind, spirit). These other souls know this (on a soul level) and can become energy suckers to the empath (this is my own personal definition).

Codependency — Is a type of dysfunctional helping relationship where one supports or enables another person’s drug addiction, alcoholism, gambling addiction, poor mental health, immaturity, irresponsibility, or under-achievement. (www.everydayhealth.com)

An empath usually gets to point of caring much too deeply on an unhealthy level. This usually starts at a very young age and gets progressively worse as we mature. We usually choose to incarnate into a family of codependency so this is what we see daily. From a very early age we learn to make sure that everyone around is happy and cared for, always before ourselves (because we came here to serve, after all!). It makes us put everyone else’s happiness before our own. It is a sad endless cycle that gets progressively worse as time goes on until you get to the point that you realize there is nothing left to give. You have been totally drained by those that you love because you are the giver and they are the taker. It is totally unconscious of course, on your part. As for the takers, they may or may not realize that this is what they are doing but you give so easily that it is human nature to take, take and take some more. Of course this is not how an empath operates so they do not understand the taker mentality.

Mistaken For Love

The codependent and usually the taker mistake this caring for love. This is not love on any level. Yes we care deeply but this is not love. For if we truly love another we step back and let them make their own choices and let the chips fall where they may.

Worry is not Love. Codependents think that constantly worry about someone is a sign of love. It is not.

Codependents are looking for ways to swoop in and save someone. This is also not love (this is actually very self serving to the ego).

Codependents usually end up not knowing who they are and what they think because they are so busy trying to help people that they have no idea what is actually their thoughts or if they are the thinking of another. This is called programming. They revolve their thoughts around what is going to make someone else happy to the detriment of their own happiness. They start to realize that they have put all of their own hopes and dreams on the back burner and that they have forgotten what they even are.

Codependents lose all sense of self as they run around trying to please everyone around them and focusing on others happiness that they forget who they are.

Codependent empaths are easy prey for master manipulators, narcissists, psychopaths, and sociopaths because of their sweet demeanor and trusting attitude, always wanting to think the best of others. This is because they do not have a mean bone in their body and it is sometimes hard to relate to others that really do not have the best intentions. They can easily manipulate you to the point that you begin to doubt every move that you make. If you find yourself in this situation you may experience verbal and emotional abuse or even physical abuse as it escalates.

When you get to the point that you realize that your life is out of control you are so deep into codependency that you think there is no way out. But there is always hope because you are a healer and you can and will heal yourself.

You learn that you have to love yourself first, in order to truly love another.

You learn to detach from others, their choices and their life and know that this is the true act of love. Detachment with love is the highest form of love! To let others live their life the way they deem appropriate. We no longer try to “SAVE” anyone. We begin to realize that they deserve to have freedom to make their own choices. We also begin to see that by giving them their freedom that we now have the freedom to do what we are called to do. We begin to realize that it is in fact, our very own ego that is self serving by trying to save another.

When we learn that we are here to serve and be a healer merely by existing then we can focus on the mission that we came here to do.

You learn that if you put your happiness first then you can truly be happy for another.

You learn that a healthy relationship is truly equal of give and take and not one sided. Learning how to have healthy relationships will be an utmost priority as you know that your energy is precious.

You eventually get so strong that you will no longer tolerate one sided relationships.

You realize that you would rather be alone than in a unhealthy relationship.

You will no longer tolerate others sucking your precious energy.

You learn to love and respect yourself and demand this in the other people in your life. You realize that this is not selfish and is in fact a form of self love.

You learn to trust yourself and your ability to spot users and not allow them into your sphere.

You begin to trust your claircognizance no matter what anyone else says. And beleive me, as you get stronger, the people around you will not like this and may up their game to try to get you to doubt yourself. After all, you have always put them and their thoughts and opinions above your own and they do not like it that now you voice your own opinions and follow your own intuition.

You realize that you have only begun to scratch the surface of your own self discovery and healing.

You become a master at unraveling and peeling away the layers of who you really are and readily dig deeper and deeper.

You begin to be so strong that no one will EVER take advantage of you again as you

“Step Into Your Power”

Of course all of this will take time to evolve as you are on your healing journey. It will depend on you and how long you have been a codependent empath (I was one for over 30 years before I realized it).

It will also depend on how hard you actually want to heal and how committed that you are to your healing journey. I would ask you to consider; Do you feel deep in your soul that you are here to heal? If so, in order to serve to your full capacity you must heal yourself and it is in this way that that you can share your journey to healing to help others. This is what I have been called to do is to share my journey to help heal others and it has driven me become a Quantum Transformational Specialist because I have been through and overcome so very much in my life. I only write/teach/guide about things that I have experienced myself. This is why my spirit team dubbed me the “Divine Warrior Goddess” as I am ruthless in my own self examination so that I may heal and release everything that is encoded in me that no longer serves me, not only from this lifetime, but all lifetimes. So that each day as I release more and more than I am more pure to serve to my fullest capacity in the New Earth in Christed Consciousness. I thoroughly love helping others to step into their power. But it is with great love, honor and respect that I do not put expectations on any of my clients as it is their own healing journey and they will only get out of it what the put into it.

Please remember that healing is YOURS FOR THE TAKING if you wish for it to be so. By you just reading this article and recognising yourself in it you are already on the road to healing. I send you much love on your healing journey!! You CAN move through it much faster than I have as the vibration on the earth plane has been raised and we are all on the ascension journey.

Love Blessings,

Kim ~ Divine Warrior Goddess ~ Helping you to “Step Into Your Power”

 

~via In5D.com

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BARRIE DAVENPORT: “17 Reasons Why Being An Intuitive Empath Is A Gift”

Do you ever feel like you have a heightened sense of understanding and emotion for other people’s feelings?

Maybe you feel like you are really good at reading people or you simply have an inclination toward being empathic.

If so, you might be an intuitive empath.

Being an intuitive empath means you have a high sensory perception and can actually be impacted by other people’s energies.

You have an innate ability to perceive those around you. But, being an empath is more than just being an especially sensitive person, and it isn’t limited to simply feeling and expressing emotions.

It is often said that empaths are naturally intuitive, and while this is true for some empaths, it is not true for all. But, if someone is intuitive, it doesn’t necessarily mean that they have a lot of empathy. Some believe the words are interchangeable, but the two abilities are actually quite different.

Empathy is one’s concern with things other than oneself — the external world. It is the ability to sense the feelings and energy of other people and one’s surroundings.

However, intuition is the internal feelings one has to evaluate and understand a situation. While it still involves absorbing the outside world, the final component is very internal.

When empathy and intuition come together, a very unique ability is born, and those who hold this trait have a special gift.

What is a true empath?

A true empath is one who can feel the pain of other people as their own. They can also feel the joy that other people feel.

Because of this, a true empath often likes to help people in order to make those around them happy and therefore be able to feel that happiness themselves.

Empaths are great listeners who never ignore people and refuse to be fake or put on a facade.

These traits probably sound like they could apply to a lot of good people, but a true empath helps other people to the point of exhaustion and is very sensitive– not only to people’s emotions but also to external factors in the environment, such as light, noise, and motion.

Intuitive Empath Traits

There are many traits that intuitive empaths share. For example, they strongly dislike seeing other people suffer and often avoid watching the news or even sad movies because of this.

After feeling strong negative emotions, intuitive empaths are then likely to feel physical symptoms in addition to their emotional despair, such as a headache and fatigue.

Intuitive empaths have a tendency to remain attached to people who are in need, even if it is not in their own best interest.

This may be a stranger or could be a partner, which puts intuitive empaths at risk for being in toxic relationships.

Some of these traits may sound like negative things, but being an empath is a gift in many ways. Here are 17 reasons why this capacity to understand other people is actually a good thing.

 

17 Reasons Why Intuitive Empaths Have A Gift

 

1. Empaths surround themselves with positive things.

When an empath sees something bad, they instinctively turn away so they don’t feel the negativity. Because of this, they try to surround themselves with only positive things.
This leads to empaths having positive friends who are aiming to live a happy and satisfying life.

Happiness is contagious, so one of the most effective ways to find happiness is to surround yourself with those who can create their own happiness and share it with others.

2. Empaths typically have meaningful careers.

Empathic people can often be found working as mentors, life coaches, and teachers. Because of their compassion for nature, they often either do volunteer work for the environment or make a career out of environmental activism.

Due to their acute senses, empaths love to spend countless hours going through nature and enjoying the songs of birds, the sounds of the ocean, and the smell of flowers.

Having a meaningful career or giving back to the community is a fulfilling way to lead a happy life.

3. They bring other people together.

People who are empathic find it deeply uncomfortable to watch other people be mean or hostile towards each other.

Due to their peaceful and easy-going nature, empaths often act as intermediaries to bring harmony between others who are at odds.

They have a gift of being peacemakers and reducing the stress of other people by decreasing any resentment that is being held.

4. They don’t rush into making decisions.

They seek a deep authenticity before making decisions. Empaths find it bothersome to settle with a solution if they feel it may have been influenced in any way.

Because they like to stay true to themselves, they will take the necessary time to come to informed decisions.

This is a gift because having the ability to resist making last-minute decisions helps people avoid having regret in the long run.

5. They can experience the emotions of their loved ones, even if they are not with that person.

It is common when an empath is in a strong relationship with someone to experience sudden surges of emotion or pain to later learn that their loved one was feeling the same emotions or pains at the same time.

Often, empaths describe this feeling as being “blindsided” by emotions when they are not expecting them.

6. They like to stay focused.

While many people may believe that having the ability to multi-task is a strength in life, this is usually not true because none of the tasks are completed at a high-quality level.

In fact, multitasking divides one’s attention into many different things at once, leading to confusion and feelings of being scattered.

Intuitive empaths feel more comfortable and do more effective work when they do their tasks one at a time and in a certain order.
Focusing on one thing at a time and doing it to the best of one’s ability can be an empath’s source of personal energy that can lead to great success.

7. They have a knack for listening to other people’s stories.

One distinctive characteristic of this population is that they offer a trustworthy and treasured sense of companionship to other people.

Other people gravitate to them and feel comfortable confiding with empaths about their own personal struggles. Even strangers may approach an empath and open up to them about their problems.

This is good because empaths know that other people feel relieved when they are done talking about their feelings.

Empaths can then feel this sense of relief themselves because they have helped someone who is having a hard time.

8. Empaths are quick to spot someone who is being deceitful.

People who are empathic can easily spot a lie.

They pick up on even subtle hints of deception, which allows them to be very trusting of those who they choose to be close to because they know the people surrounding them are not deceitful people.

However, this also means that empaths know when someone is hiding something when they say they are “fine”.

Empaths know when these people are actually crying on the inside and putting up a false front.

9. They pick up on non-verbal cues.

One of the greatest gifts that an empath has is the ability to read other people. This allows them to quickly decide if someone they meet will end up being a part of their life for the long-term or not.

In addition to non-verbal cues, empaths can pick up on even slight indications of others’ physical needs and emotions.

This gives them a specific talent for being able to pick up on the needs of those who cannot speak, like animals, babies, and the human body.

10. They are able to see the big picture.

Having a sense of synchronicity allows empathic people to grasp the grand scheme of things because they can recognize the interconnectedness of each individual organism in the world.

Being able to see the big picture allows people to feel a sense of meaning in what they do and work towards a final goal, which ends up being more fulfilling.

11. Empaths have great imaginations.

When an empath finds themselves stuck in a mundane daily routine, they tend to drift off using their great imagination.

If their surroundings are not providing any emotional stimuli, empaths can easily lose interest in what is going on around them and get into their own world of imagination and creativity.

12. They are creative and artistic.

Empaths can convey a message in ways that other people can’t. They are able to use their feelings to project their artistic and creative talents.

This could come out in many forms, such as dancing, painting, writing poetry, or playing music.

Empaths have a special talent for creativity in life with not only art, but also their experiences, situations, and various conditions that arise.

Because empaths think in a unique way, they are able to see certain things that other people can’t quite conceptualize as easily. This thoughtful creativity and ability to process information in a distinct way is a notable capacity.

13. Empaths can see everyone’s point of view.

One of the reasons that empaths are such good friends to other people is because they are willing to listen to and understand everyone’s point of view.

This also makes them be able to be life-long learners as they cross paths with many different types of people.

14. They are natural healers.

Empaths are natural healers and can actually give their healing energy to other people through their senses.

They possess a healing energy that can help those around them and help themselves as well.

15. They have a huge enthusiasm for life.

Because empaths feel everything with such strength, they are prone to feeling greater highs than other people.

Therefore, most empaths are very enthusiastic about life and they are able to experience joy with a greater intensity, which leads them to be more kind, caring, and compassionate towards other people.

16. Empaths are comfortable being alone.

A lot of people who are not empathic feel uncomfortable being alone, but empaths crave time alone and actually need it in order to balance themselves and de-stress.

They value this time to have a chance to recuperate and are able to increase their self-awareness because of this.

17. They are able to contribute to other people’s lives like no one else can.

Because empaths truly care about other people, they are able to touch the lives of those who feel like they have no one to turn to.

This means they can make a huge difference in people’s lives and leave a positive impact on those who are possibly suffering.

Final Thoughts

While being intuitively empathic may seem draining because you are taking on the feelings, burdens, and emotions of other people, it is actually a great gift to have.

It is important to learn how to protect yourself from becoming dragged down by negative energies and find a way to practice self-care to release the negativity.

Empaths understand very clearly that the problems in the world won’t be solved by hate, instead, they need to be addressed with love and understanding.

It is important to people who are empathic to use their energy in a positive way for the world, even if it is through small actions like donating to a food bank or volunteering their time.

Being able to positively impact the world can help anyone feel positive about their empathic and intuitive feelings.

 

 

~via LiveBoldAndBloom.com

ALETHEIA LUNA: “4 Popular Myths About Being An Empath”

Thin-skinned, hyper-sensitive, sooky, wimpy, spineless, wussy, feeble, weak, fragile, melodramatic, temperamental…

If you can relate to, or have been called a combination of any of these words, chances are you’re part of a unique group of people: the Empaths.

Occurring in an estimated 5% of the population, Empaths are known for their highly developed ability to sense the emotions and thoughts of the people around them. As author and empath Christel Broederlow put it “empaths often possess the ability to sense others on many different levels”, this includes the abilities to intimately understand what a person desires, yearns for, and is currently feeling, suffering or thinking, as well as the ability to feel other people’s bodily illnesses. These occurrences manifest themselves as energy vibrations that the finely tuned empath can pick up on, or “tune into”.

Commonly identifying as clairsentients and HSP’s, Empaths possess an ability that is both a blessing and a curse. On one hand, the empath is an excellent listener and counselor, knowing the best way to comfort and assist those around them. On the other, being an empath can be painful and tiring. It’s common for the empath to be weighed down and constantly congested with the negative emotional energy of others, often creating physical and psychological disharmony.

Although the empath has a wonderful gift, and is often greatly cherished by those around them, they are often challenged and confronted by a variety of misguided perceptions towards their innate gift.

Myths & Misunderstandings

“You need to grow some thicker skin! Stop being so overly sensitive.” I wish I could tell you how many times I heard that in my childhood! Growing up as an empath, you may have experienced similar insults from your parents, friends or peers, and perhaps even worse.

It’s not at all trendy or popular to be sensitive or feeling in our society that values efficiency, cold calculation and industrial resilience. Therefore, you may have experienced and still experience, a lot of antagonism towards your behavior as an Empath. I will explore 4 of these main misconceptions below.

Myth #1 – Empaths are navel-gazing and self-absorbed.

Truth – We often focus more on others than on ourselves.

It’s true that Empaths are often unexplainably moody and quiet on the outside. However, this isn’t because they’re excessively absorbed thinking too much about themselves and their feelings. Rather, the empath is often deeply affected by the exterior emotions of others that he experiences as his own. The empath’s ability to intuitively feel the feelings of others is what weighs him down so much. In fact, it’s characteristic of the empath to pay more attention to others needs than his own.

Myth #2 – Empaths are mentally ill.

Truth – We are magnets for negative energy. This often creates psychological disbalance within us.

Empaths are excellent listeners, confidants and counselors. For this reason, it’s common for people to be drawn towards their sincere and caring natures, almost like magnets. Therefore, empaths often experience a lot of “emotional baggage dumping” from other people, and have difficult releasing themselves from the negative energy that remains in their minds and bodies afterwards.

Unfortunately, this can lead to a lot of lingering depressive emotions that the empath is left with. Thus, the empath can appear to be mentally ill and depressed, and in some cases legitimately is. However, in most cases the empath is congested with remnants of harmful emotional energy, like sinuses are congested with mucus during a flu virus.

The root of the problem doesn’t lie with the empath , it’s a result of their outer emotional climate.

Myth #3 – Empaths are psychologically frail.

Truth – We are biologically programmed to be more sensitive and in tune with our surrounding environment.

As empath Nicole Lawler wrote, Empaths are essentially “walking around in this world with all the accumulated karma, emotions, and energy from others”. Understandably, this results in a lot of inner emotional tension for the empath who is more prone to crying and exhibiting other signs of “weakness”.

Additionally, the empath finds it extremely difficult to partake in many “normal” activities. For instance, watching a movie about Nazi concentration camps is extremely emotionally upsetting for the empath , and getting a job in an office is overwhelming and tiring for the empath who is bombarded with other people’s emotions constantly. Therefore, it’s not surprising that the empath is often perceived as “wussy”, “frail” or “weak minded” to the person who fails to comprehend the constant pressure the empath lives under.

The fact that most empaths aren’t driven clinically insane by the constant emotional flux they experience is testimony enough to their mental strength.

Myth #4 – Empaths are lazy.

Truth – We often lack mental, emotional and physical energy due to our intense empathetic ability to understand others.

Chronic Fatigue Syndrome (CFS) amongst other physical issues like headaches, insomnia and Fibromyalgia, have all been commonly attributed to Empaths.

If our minds are constantly overloaded with stress, tension and pressure, it therefore translates that our bodies are as well. This often results in sicknesses such as the ones mentioned above. Thus empaths often lack the energy and therefore desire to do many things, preferring to relax (including taking naps) instead.

 

 

~via LonerWolf.com

CONSCIOUS REMINDER: “You Need To Stop Absorbing Other People’s Negative Energy, And This Is How To Do It”

Empathy is the ability to recognize and feel other peoples emotions. Sympathy is feeling compassion for other people.

Often times to be an “empath” means that you are absorbing much of the pain and suffering in your environment, which can sacrifice your ability to function at a high level.

5 Ways To Stop Absorbing Negative Energy

If you have ever been in a room with a negative person, you know just how toxic their energy can be. Learning to stop absorbing negative energy from others is such a great spiritual skill to have. Here are five ways to stop absorbing negative energy:

1. Remember, you can’t please everyone.

If someone is bullying you, complaining about you, or dissing you, do not make it your mission to try to convince that person to like you. This will only suck you deeper into that energy field and will make you energetically dependent on their opinion of you.

Not everyone is going to like you. Everyone on earth is living here for a different purpose. By loving yourself first, you will create a forcefield around other peoples opinions that will protect you from being so drained by their opinions.

Also remember, you can’t change everyone. Don’t make it your mission to fix them in that moment either. Sometimes, the best thing you can do is not try to change them but to just not feed the energy that they are projecting at you.

2. Be careful who you invite into your life.

Your body, mind and direct environment is your temple. Who are you inviting in? Is it an open invitation? Do people even have to wipe their feet clean before walking around or is it ok if they drag mud onto your soul? In Brazil there is a slang word called folgado. The direct meaning is “loose” or “lazy” but it really means “freeloader”. There is not exact english equivalent though because it is a mentality even more than a lifestyle.

If you give a person a piece of bread one day, they will be asking for the loaf the next. If you let someone stay for a weekend, they will then try to stay the week (or two!). I once thought my wife was cold and mean spirited towards some of our neighbors. Once I realized she was merely respecting herself and her home, I valued her direction and adopted it as my own.

It is great to be generous but there is a fine line to work with so you are not being trampled on, thus disabling you from helping those who truly need it. Learn to say “no” and to be OK with that.

3. Stop paying attention.

A parasite needs a host to survive. When you pay attention to somebody else, you are giving them energy. Whatever you focus on grows and energy vampires will steal your thoughts — decreasing your energy levels. Some people will dump their energy onto you and then drive on to the next pit stop. A friendly ear can be a wonderful thing but there is, again, a line that does not need to be crossed.

Perhaps you’ve found yourself being the source for a person to relay their frustrations at work, a relationship or even successful accomplishments. All of these emotions can drain you in various ways and cause you to measure your own life in ways that are not productive.

Love yourself enough to tune them out, tell them to stop, or tell them you can’t handle it right now. It’s not mean of you to reject their toxic energy.

4. Breathe in nature.

Go into nature, meditate, relax and breathe. Purify the water within yourself, exercise and float easy. Like a butterfly, float gently but move fast. Breathing increases the bloodflow circulation around the body and will help prevent to absorb energy from those around you. Walk with confidence, keep your head up and don’t allow anyone to make you feel inferior. A caterpillar eats everything around it and becomes fat, immobile. It must first become light in order to fly.

5. Take 100% responsibility for your thoughts and emotions.

How you feel is 100% your own responsibility. The universe is sending people into your life to test us. The perception we have of ourselves is greater than the perception others have of us. You are not a victim, nobody has power over you. Consider how your thoughts or expectations may have manifested the situation that is bothering you. What if the answer lies within your level of patience, irritability, or compassion? Unless we take the time to look, we subconsciously affirm our own victimization to the world around us.

Once you hold yourself accountable and responsible for the way you choose to respond to something, you connect with yourself on a deeper level. When you are connected to yourself on a deeper level, you don’t get knocked off your center as easily.

Place yourself in situations that boost your own energies. Does this person make you feel good? Do you make that person feel good? You are worthy of a brilliant experience and it is time to realize that fact. Learning to protect yourself against other people’s energies starts with self-love. Remember that you are worth of happiness and peace, it’s OK to say no. and you are the author of your own energetic state.

 

 

~via ConsciousReminder.com

MATEO SOL: “5 Things Every Sensitive Man Should Know”

If you have grown up as a male in our society you’ve been taught one very clear message: emotions are a weakness, big boys don’t cry.

Being “strong” means you have to be forceful, aggressive, competitive and largely unemotional. If for some reason you are born sensitive, cooperative and compassionate, you are perceived as “weak,” “effeminate” or “weird.”

Throughout history, men have gained their identity, peer respect and self-worth through status, sexual prowess and money all of which contributed to their sense of power. In a physically demanding hunter-gatherer and agricultural world, men had to be the warriors that shouldered the responsibility of providing for their families. But now as women have become more independent with our society shifting to value mental labor over physical labor, men are struggling to let go of their old warrior habits and role dynamics.

However, regardless of our external bodies and sexual orientations, we all carry differing degrees of masculine and feminine energy. Some people will carry equal amounts, others will carry more of one than of the other (which might oppose their physical bodies), as can be seen in females referred to as “tomboys” and sensitive men.

It saddens me to see so many fellow men who outright ignore their sensitivity, or are aware of it but choose to reject or hide it. Many people associate sensitivity with neuroticism or low self-esteem, and courage with “numbing the pain.” Sensitivity and courage are not mutually exclusive. To be sensitive is to be aware of the feelings and perspectives of other people as well as your own. To be courageous means to be completely aware and to feel fear yet to still fight for what you feel is right or what you want.

In fact sensitivity and courage can compliment each other; the greater your sensitivity and fear is, the greater your courage has to be to fight through it.

In psychology, Carl Jung was aware of the differences between masculine and feminine energy, and divided them into his Anima and Animus Archetypes. Personally, I’ve found that by embracing my sensitivity as a male and using it alongside my logic and courage, I have become a much wholer human being. In the end, to be intelligent is useless unless you can combine it with sensitivity. When intelligence is filtered through sensitivity, it becomes wisdom.

5 Things Every Sensitive Man Should Know

Here are some vital lessons I’ve learned as a sensitive man that I want to pass on:

1. Sensitivity Helps You to Grow Deeper Connections

When a man is capable of transforming his insecurity about being sensitive into something empowering, it can allow him to create deeper connections with others. For instance, I’ve found that when I go beyond simply sharing factual information and opinions with my male friends, I see a whole new side to them which is more meaningful and creates a deeper long-term bond.

2. Sensitivity Encourages Emotional Maturity

I feel that the evolution of men will be one towards a balance of strength and sensitivity. One of the biggest struggles for men in relationships is to openly express their emotions or show vulnerability. This emotional distancing is done to display “strength,” but quite often the more sensitive female lover perceives this as ambivalence, being “unavailable” or even a phobia towards commitment. To be able to give love, show love and receive love freely is incredibly attractive.

3. Sensitivity Makes You More Body-Conscious

Sensual awareness is not limited to sex (although it does make you a better lover), but rather, it extends to the body as well. The greater your sensitivity is to your body and its senses, the more you’ll learn about yourself, the better you’ll be able to take care of yourself, and the healthier you’ll feel. However, I’ve observed that often many sensitive male students of mine have tried to drown their emotions out with food as an unconscious buffer.

As a sensitive man, I’ve discovered a variety of foods that I can feel my body quickly rejects by making me feel subtly ill. I’ve also learned that having long hair not only allows me to express my Anima externally, but it also serves as an extension of my nervous system amplifying my empathic senses. It’s no surprise that the Incas, Mayas, the Samurai and the Native Americans were aware of this (the latter using their hair almost like “antennae.”)

4. Sensitivity Allows You to Become More Creative

Creativity is not the result of logical empirical deduction, it is the child of playfulness and sensitivity. Creativity is born in the right side of the brain instead of the left.

To be a painter, writer, musician, actor, photographer or anything creative requires a sensitivity towards beauty and emotion.

5. Sensitivity Helps You to Grow Spiritually

A thirst for wisdom and truth can only come to those who possess a spiritual sensitivity. To strive toward a better society and the peace of man demands an immense amount of courage to stand up against the status quo and a great spiritual sensitivity to question it.

Jesus, Buddha, the Dalai Lama, Mahatma Gandhi, and Martin Luther King Jr. were all figures who possessed this quality to speak the truth and question cultural morality, virtue and justice. Many people who have embraced their sensitivity will know that they are often the ones whom their friends come to, to ask for counsel and advice.

How to Embrace Your Sensitivity

In our society men are rarely taught how to express their feelings, and so it can be very difficult to know where or how to begin. In fact, if you are like most men, you’ll find it difficult to even become aware of what you’re feeling in the first place, e.g. how the mood of your boss may be affecting you, or how the stress from your busy schedule is making you short-tempered. And when someone asks how you are, you are so disconnected from your emotions that you’ll resort to the habitual “I’m fine,” making it harder for anyone to provide any support.

Ignoring feelings won’t making them disappear though, in fact, the more we ignore our feelings the larger they’ll grow. I’ve often seen men who appear to be well and calm before they burst out in an explosion of anger or rage when something bad happens. It’s often these very same men who become isolated and depressed due to their tendency to avoid and limit their social contact to avoid emotional vulnerability.

How do we embrace our sensitivity? Recognizing and accepting ourselves as sensitive men is the first step. No matter what “macho” ideals you’ve been taught, sensitivity is a gift, not a weakness. To be more empathetic and to be able to appreciate art, music and beauty, is a blessing. While burying our feelings is certainly easier, acknowledging our feelings helps us to empower ourselves which requires much more courage, and is a lot more rewarding. Can you imagine how many wars and ecological forms of destruction could have been avoided if we all cultivated greater sensitivity?

The next step is to examine your feelings about sensitivity. Is it a “weakness” or some kind of illness to you? You’ll have to change the core beliefs you hold about masculine sensitivity in order to accept it. Only after this can you integrate aspects of your sensitivity into your daily life. You can do this by changing your old habits of ignoring or hiding your sensitivity and instead decide to slowly process through them, expressing them to yourself and your trusted loved ones.

It takes time and effort, but changing our personal paradigms is essential in order to embrace our own sense of personal power. It’s time to change this outdated male ideal of aggressiveness, thick-skin and emotional retardation. By empowering sensitive men with self-confidence, we’ll all contribute to a more peaceful, balanced and healthy planet.

Once you become aware of your feelings and have learned to express them, you’ll begin drawing loving people into your life, you’ll be able to help others through their own problems, and you’ll be able to feel as though every part of you is living life to the fullest.

 

 

 ~via LonerWolf.com