NIKKI SAPP: “Seven Ways to Heal Negative Emotions”

“If God him/her/itself arrived at your doorstep for dinner, how would you treat him/her/it? Most likely with the utmost respect and reverence, right? So now you know how you should treat each emotion that arises as well.”

~Nikki Sapp

 

When you come to a point in your self-awareness process where you are beginning to become acutely aware of the emotional responses that are happening within you day-to-day, you may have found that there is a very fine line between showing support to yourself while you experience painful emotions and attaching yourself to the emotions as a sense of identity.

Walking this line, trying to find a balance between the two proves to be the difference between becoming a confident, healed and self-loving person, rooted in awareness rather than ego or being a victim of life, so intertwined with our painful emotions and the stories attached to them that they become extremely difficult to heal to completion.

While one should never use their idea of “being a positive person” as a means of trying to get rid of the natural emotions that are arising in them by methods of manipulation or judgment, there is undoubtedly approaches in dealing with painful or “negative emotions” that are in fact effective in helping them heal and transform all on their own, which in turn creates the space by which the blissful “positive” emotions that are our inherent nature can arise.

Seven Ways to Heal Negative Emotions

 

1. Acknowledge them

We cannot change that which we deny is even happening, which is why the very initial step to helping to create a space for healing for any emotion is to acknowledge it’s existence. You don’t even have to name the emotion if you are at a point where you can meditate and feel into the energy of the emotion, but nonetheless you must see that it is there.

Most emotions orbit repeatedly in our energy field because they have been feared, rejected or denied which only perpetuates them. When a painful emotion arises, that should tell you a deeper inquiry is required. Simply put, they are arising to be seen so that they can eventually be healed by you.

2. Honor Them

If we know that all stems from source (God/the divine/the omnipresent Universe) we should also know that even painful emotions fit into this category as well. Knowing this is a huge reason why honoring each emotion as God is hugely transformative.

If God him/her/itself arrived at your doorstep for dinner, how would you treat him/her/it? Most likely with the utmost respect and reverence, right?

So now you know how you should treat each emotion that arises as well. While it’s easy to treat joyful emotions with respect, it’s not as so with the emotions that feel painful in our body, but nonetheless that respect is required in assisting these emotions into a place where they can relax and dissolve into our awareness.

3. Do not blame them on anyone/ Do not own them as your own

Here is another approach that can be rather tricky, especially if you are new into self-awareness. Very often our emotions come as an onset after someone else’s behavior or words, which makes it “feel” like that person is to blame for the emotion. On one level of consciousness this may feel true, but those who are seasoned in self-awareness know something that takes this perspective into a higher truth.

That pearl of insight, is that people are coming into our lives to act as catalysts to bring up the very emotions that exist unhealed in our energy field. This means that rather than blaming them for causing the emotion (which completely disempowers us into needing them to change or apologize before we can heal), we can see them as messengers that provide unlikely clues into our own healing.

On the opposite end, we must also not become to attached to the idea of ownership from within either. We are the consciousness behind the emotion, so while there may be a limiting belief that is running a program in our subconscious mind that has been triggered by the action of another, it does not mean we ARE that emotion.

We are simply the awareness who has the power to heal that defunct programming and emotional block by observing it, feeling it, and respecting it — but not owning it.

4. See them as evidence of their opposite vibration

One helpful way to assist in actually having the courage to feel an emotion head on, is to know that emotions dissolve as a way to create space for their opposite to emerge. This means that all unworthiness — when actually faced and felt — is creating the healing space that makes way for worthiness to arise in it’s place.

Anytime you are able to pinpoint what emotion you are having, you can acknowledge it and also bless it with it’s opposite, or even just declare, “I accept that this fear of not having enough is the evidence that space is being created for abundance consciousness. In knowing this, I allow myself to feel this fear completely without judgment as it’s simply healing as I’m feeling it.”

5. Thank Them

As we come to know that no emotion arises as a mistake, we come to see some of the hidden gifts emotional responses contain. One is helping us identify where we are holding onto a subconscious belief or definition that is out of alignment with our highest truth.

All emotions stem from a belief, so no negative emotion can arise without there also being a belief behind it. Knowing this makes these emotions amazing gifts in helping us to re-write our subconscious beliefs!

By taking the time to sit with each emotion and appreciate it for the healing benefits and clues it contains, the emotions begin to soften and reveal their source — meaning the subconscious belief they stemmed from. As we re-write that belief we are able to heal that emotion.

6. Celebrate them

With many things on the spiritual journey it is the most ironic or unheard of approach that actually is effective. Probably the last thing you would ever think to do when a painful emotion arises is celebrate it’s arrival– which is why this approach is also hugely transformational.

Treat it like you truly cherish it’s arrival and are so humbled to have it’s presence and the wisdom it holds in your energy field. Watch how quickly you are able to detach from negativity when you do the one thing that you would have never thought to, which is actually celebrate it’s existence instead of judging or resisting it.

7. Welcome them back home into the light

Imagine your open heart as a doorway into the light for each emotion. As you open your heart and allow yourself to feel the energetic signature of each emotion, what you are actually doing is letting that emotion be welcomed into your heart space, which leads to the light that you are. The light is where all emotions go to heaven so to speak.

You may have heard the word alchemy in relation to the spiritual journey and this approach is exactly what that word means. Alchemists use the light of their true nature to be avenue by which painful emotions are dissolved into space — by simply feeling them to completion and welcoming them into their heart space.

It is important to note that it is most likely that you will need to use more than one or a combination of a few different approaches with each emotion. Nonetheless, it’s also important to remember to honor your humanity in all of this.

It’s often easy to see ourselves spiritual robots here to use our techniques to get rid of all that “negative energy” we don’t want to deal with, but without also honoring the part of us that innocently feels these emotions from a human place, we become the manipulators of our emotions vs. the safe place they long for to return home.

 

~via FractalEnlightenment.com

JUDITH ORLOFF: “Sensing Energy — 5 Strategies To Read People’s Emotional Energy”

246575_442734952425928_1831631283_n-3

Emotions are a stunning expression of our energy, the “vibe” we give off.  We register these with intuition.  Some people feel good to be around; they improve your mood and vitality.  Others are draining; you instinctively want to get away.  This “subtle energy” can be felt inches or feet from the body, though it‘s invisible.  Indigenous cultures honor this energy as life force.  In Chinese medicine it‘s called chi, a vitality that‘s essential to health.  Though the molecular structure of subtle energy isn’t fully defined, scientists have measured increased photon emissions and electromagnetic readings about healers who emit it during their work.

Emotional energy is contagious. It can make the difference between a toxic and healthy relationship.  It’s crucial to get a clear read on this aspect of anyone you plan to regularly interact with.  Then, you can decide whether a relationship is feasible based on your energetic compatibility.  In my medical practice and life this chemistry is a deal breaker.  Experience has taught me that it’s pointless to work with a patient or form a friendship if such basic rapport isn’t there.  You don’t have to force a fit when the energy feels right.  Forcing anything is simply the mind’s attempt to interfere with flow.  Of course, we all have quirks, anxieties, and fears, but energy cements your bond with others and motivates you to work through the rough spots.  Nevertheless, healthy relationships have a momentum that carries them, a surrender that feels more natural when you‘re both in sync.

When reading emotions, realize that what others say or how they appear frequently don‘t match their energy.  You must let go of the notion that what you see is what you always get.  As a psychiatrist I’ve observed how people go to great lengths, purposely or not, to appear in certain ways — either to impress, say the right thing, or sell you on something — but this “self” isn’t aligned with their true emotions.  Consider these examples: your spouse apologizes for blowing up but her hostility still lingers.  A man you just met tries to charm you, but you don’t feel much heart there.  A friend seems cheerful but you sense that she’s hurting inside.  Realize: just because people smile doesn’t mean they’re happy.  Or just because people are reserved, doesn’t mean they’re not ecstatic.  Ultimately, the energy transmitted by someone’s smile and presence tells the truth about where they’re at.  So, be smart enough to correlate a person’s energy with their emotions.  Most people aren’t being intentionally misleading — often they don‘t know what they feel or project.  They might tell you one thing — and believe it — but you’ll learn to decode their emotions.

Here, the surrender to focus on is saying “yes” to the messages your body sends.  Your mind may want to talk you out of your body’s wisdom.  Don’t allow it to.  Reading energy lets you attune to how you relate to people, who you feel comfortable around and who you don’t.  To avoid bad relationships and regrets, you must let go of trying to convince yourself of anything the body’s intuition doesn’t affirm.  To help with this surrender, here’s what to do.  When identifying how you energetically respond to others always ask, How does my body feel?  Does my energy go up or down?  Then follow your body’s lead rather than resisting it.  In practical terms this means: you want to marry someone who increases your energy not drains it, regardless of how perfect he or she looks on paper.  You want to sit beside a coworker who’s positive, not negative.  You want to choose friends you resonate with so that you can nurture each other.  Then notice the positive difference in your life. To experience the pleasure of compatible relationships, use the following tips.

Strategies to read emotional energy

Sense people’s presence — This is the overall energy we emit, not necessarily congruent with words or behavior.  It‘s the emotional atmosphere surrounding us like a rain cloud or the sun.  For instance, they may give off an aura of mystery, joy, or sadness.  To compare extremes, think of the Dalai Lama’s, compassionate presence versus Charles Manson’s deranged darkness.  Presence is also associated with charisma, a personal magnetism that you‘re drawn to.  Warning: charisma doesn’t always contain heart, something to beware of. Charisma without heart can’t be trusted.  It’s a dangerous combination present in many con artists and seducers.

As you read people notice: does their overall energy feel warm?  Calming?  Uplifting? Invigorating like a breath of fresh air?  Or is it draining?  Cold?  Detached?  Angry?  Jarring?  Depressed?  Do they have a friendly presence that attracts you?  Or are you getting the willies, making you back off.  Also see if people look anchored in their bodies, indicating their feet are firmly planted on the ground.  Or are they floating outside themselves, which may indicate flakiness and distractibility?

Watch people’s eyes  We can make love or hate with our eyes.  Our eyes transmit powerful energies, what the Sufi poet Rumi calls “the glance.”  Just as the brain has an electromagnetic signal extending beyond the body, studies indicate that the eyes project this too.  In fact, research reveals that people can sense when they‘re being stared at, even when no one is in sight — an experience reported by police officers, soldiers and hunters.  Indigenous cultures respect the energy of the eyes.  Some believe that the “evil eye” is a gaze that inflicts injury or bad luck on its target.  Also, science has documented “the look of love.”  Joining eyes with a loved one (or dog!) triggers a biochemical response, releasing oxytocin, the warm and fuzzy “love hormone.”  The more oxytocin your brain has, the more trusting and peaceful you’ll feel.

Take time to observe people’s eyes.  Are they caring?  Sexy?  Tranquil?  Mean?  Angry?  The way others look at you can make you feel adored or afraid.  Also determine: is there someone at home in their eyes, indicating a capacity for intimacy?  Or do they seem to be guarded or hiding?  Certain people’s eyes can be hypnotic.  Avoid looking deeply into eyes you distrust or sense may be dangerous.  The less you engage negative people, the less they’ll zone in on you.  On the other hand, feel free to fall into people’s eyes who you cherish.  Enjoy all that beautiful energy!

Notice the feel of a handshake, hug and touch  We share emotional energy through physical contact much like an electrical current.  Ask yourself: Does a handshake or hug feel warm, comfortable, confident?  Or is it off-putting so you want to withdraw?  Are people’s hands clammy, signaling anxiety.  Or limp, suggesting being non-committal and timid?  Is their grip too strong, even crushing your fingers, indicating aggression or over control?  Along with physical cues, the energy of touch reveals people’s emotions.  Some hugs and handshakes impart kindness, joy, and calm whereas others feel clingy, draining, even hostile.  Therefore, spend time with people whose energy you like.  Be wary of those you don’t so you‘re not depleted.  Avoid physical contact (including making love) with anyone whose energy doesn’t feel good.

Listen for people’s tone of voice and laugh — The tone and volume of our voice can tell much about our emotions.  Sound frequencies create vibrations.  Some frequencies we hear.  Below an audible range, sound can be felt (think of a bass vibration).  When reading people, notice how their tone of voice affects you.  Words ride the energy of tone, its warmth and coldness.  Ask yourself: Does their tone feel soothing?  Or is it abrasive, snippy, or whiny?  Are they a soft-talker or mumbler whom you can barely hear, signs of meekness or low self-esteem?  Or do they talk too loud or too much, signs of anxiety, narcissism, or insensitivity.  Are they fast-talkers, trying to sell you something?  Or boring you to death with a slow monotone, suggesting depression and no spontaneity?  Be aware of sighing which relays sadness or frustration.  Also, a pinched voice suggests emotional repression, over control, or a thyroid disorder.  Always observe how much people laugh, a sign of lightheartedness.  Does their laugh sound genuine?  Fake?  Child-like?  Joyous?  Or are they overly serious, rarely laughing?  In addition, a quivering voice and sudden change in pitch can indicate potential signs of deception.

Sense people’s heart energy — The most important aspect to read about energy is whether people exude a sense of heart.  This is the loving-kindness in us, our capacity for empathy, giving and connection.  When heart is present you‘ll feel the warmth of emanating from others which makes you feel safe and at ease.  It‘s the unspoken sense of being accepted, not judged.  No one can fake this.  Our heart presence builds through our good intentions, deeds and emotional work to overcome fear and negativity.  The heart is the most positive quality anyone can have.  It‘s healthy to be drawn to it.

Reading energy is a game-changer where intense emotions blur your clarity.  It enables you to see past fantasies or desires to pinpoint someone‘s motivations by sensing invisible messages they give off.  I was once attracted to a man, a successful financial manager who knew exactly what to say to melt my heart.  Todd was from the country club set and much too conservative for my taste — I often fall for wild, creative men.  Yet he was smart, boyishly playful, seemed to “see” me and respect my sensitivities.  We could discuss anything from politics to the nature of the universe and he’d speak to me in an appreciative low tone of voice I melted around (I’m very responsive to sound).  Still, from the start, when I looked into Todd’s eyes, I had the oddest feeling — there was no “there” there.  His eyes seemed cold, vacant, even a touch mean.  However, for better or worse, I was drawn to him, which doesn’t happen to me every day.  I really wanted to surrender to my romantic feelings for Todd, to explain away the niggling truth his eyes conveyed, though I knew I ignored this red flag at my own peril.  But, as the desiring mind can do when it wants something, it downplayed intuition.  I rationalized, “You‘re just too picky.  Todd is wonderful.  It‘s crazy to let his eyes stop me.” My friends also told me this, and I agreed.  So, for a year, I stayed in the relationship.  But in the end, this man‘s eyes revealed his true colors.

The problem was that Todd was a super-smooth operator and my raging hormones were blinding me.  Also, I was naive.  I confused his seductive energy with heartfelt caring and was horribly susceptible to the charisma he wielded so well.  It was a perfect storm of forces I didn’t have a handle on.  I needed to sort them through before I could read him from a neutral place which at that time was light years away.  A policy of mine is to study what makes me weak or strong, so I can learn from it.  If something knocks me off my center I want to know why and not repeat the situation.  To break Todd’s spell, I had to grasp that what excited him most was not to love me but to have power over me.  I just couldn’t grasp how he or anyone could feel that way.  He‘d reel me in with gorgeous intimacy, then be unavailable.  Or he‘d be incredibly sensitive, then incredibly cold.  I kept wracking my brains, “What could he possibly be getting from this?”  Slowly, I came to understand that he got off on the rush of being in control.  For him, it was an aphrodisiac.  I didn’t operate like this, nor had that been a dynamic in my past relationships.  But, thanks to Todd, I can recognize it now.  In retrospect, I‘m grateful to have learned this lesson about power versus love from a perfect teacher.  Also, I realized that once again, I’d talked myself out of intuition in favor of passion.  I’d surrendered to the wrong thing, to what I wanted, rather than what I “saw.” However, being human, sometimes I have to keep making the same mistakes until I finally learn.  Today, I value the energy of the eyes more than ever.  It communicates an essence in someone if we can trust this.

In your life, get used to reading people’s emotions.  Factor what you sense into your total assessment.  Maybe just a single red flag will appear so you‘re not sure what to do.  Then, take your time.  Watch how people treat you.  Notice if their words back up their behavior.  The purpose of reading energy is to become more empathic by sensing the nuances of different personalities.  Stay alert to the signals energy sends so that you can see the whole person.

 

 

~via bodymindsoulspirit.com