NIKKI SAPP: “Giving Advice and Being the Light for Others”

“I find the best way to love someone is not to change them but instead, help them reveal the greatest version of themselves”

~Dr. Steve Maraboli

 

At a certain point in our spiritual journey we begin to unlock our own inner truth. We no longer are looking to outside sources such as religions, gurus, self-help books, etc. to tell us what to do and how to be, but instead we begin to realize that the answers were inside of us all along.

Not to say that we still don’t read books or open ourselves up to learning from others, but rather we have a more clear connection with our own intuition, which allows us to FEEL the “truth” rather than intellectualize it only.

When we were at the point that we needed outside sources to show us the way, they were coincidentally brought into our lives, either in the forms of other people, reading material, or any modality of spirituality that best fit our own personal needs.

Once, we have graduated from needing the constant affirmation and validation from these outside entities, we most likely will find that we have become the “teacher” that has manifested in someone else’s life in the form of a way-shower.

Then it becomes our turn to be the light on someone else’s path. If you have found yourself in this position, consider your responsibility very carefully. Life is a constant journey of learning and growing, and just like there will be countless teachers on our path of growth, we will also find ourselves in situations that we must be the teacher.

So what is the most effective way of being the light and giving someone advice? How do we go about showing someone the way to their own inner truth while still allowing them to learn their own lessons without our interference?

“A teacher is never a giver of truth; he is a guide, a pointer to the truth that each student must find for himself.”

~Bruce Lee

 

The only person we will have the power to change is ourselves. No matter how much we want the best for someone, want them to be happy, want them to realize their inner light, or want them to be their best self, we cannot force them to do any of these things.

And just like we had to walk our own journey, complete with struggle, adversity, heartache, sadness, anger, etc.. we must realize that all these things are a part of the human experience, so they too will most likely have to go through all of them.

When we give advice to others we must always realize we are only speaking from our own inner truth, the truth as we know it given the situations and circumstances that we’ve experienced.

However, their life is not ours. Their truth will never be exactly the same as our truth because their mind is not our mind and their life has not been exactly as ours has. What we can do however is be in our own awareness and light so strongly that we become an inspiration for them to find their own awareness and light.

If a person comes to us for advice and questions we can’t come up with a million “You need to…” or “You should do this…”, directives, but instead, only point them in the direction of their own inner light and unconditional love. The only advice there ever is to really give is to accept the “what is” and love yourself anyway.

All arrows should point back to unconditional love of the self… no matter if the person is sad, depressed, frustrated, insecure, it doesn’t matter. As long as they have identified the feeling, felt it without resisting it, accepted themselves for having it and loved it, there can be nothing else to do. Without attaching ourselves to the outcome of whether they follow our advice or not, we actually free ourselves and them.

We don’t fear for them, because we trust that their journey is bringing them to the right people and situations that are perfect for them. And they don’t abandon their own inner self by blindly attaching to whatever we are saying as their ultimate truth, which may not always be what’s best for them.

However, if we find that we have been put in another person’s life to help them, guide them or show them something, we must trust that the Universe is speaking through us in the best and most effective way possible. Without doubting ourselves, we find that our inner light shines automatically and manifests in the best way possible for all parties involved, as long as we trust that it always will.

“As we let our light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence actually liberates others.”

~Marianne Williamson

 

We will sometimes be students and we will sometimes be teachers in life. Since we cannot ever know everything about everything, we will find that this role reversal happens over and over throughout our lives.

The most amazing thing about all of this is that as soon as we think we are giving someone else advice and showing them the way, as most teachers know, we realize that we were also giving ourselves the same advice.

Sometimes the Universe brings another person to us in the form of a student, but in actuality in our helping of them, we are actually helping ourselves with the same issue. By being in the form of another person, we were able to look at the situation in a different way, from a 3rd party perspective, that we weren’t able to do when dealing with ourselves and our own life.

As always, we must be the change we wish to see in the world. In doing this, we find that we always attract the right people into our lives, either to teach us something about ourselves or to be the teacher for them.

But if we really pay attention and become super aware of how things happen in this ironic Universe, we realize…. it is always both.

 

~via FractalEnlightenment.com

CONSCIOUS REMINDER: “7 Benefits From Stepping Out Of Your Comfort Zone”

Ascension Avatar: A double-Pisces with Cancer ascending like myself might disagree about ‘stepping out’ of the comfort zone since that ‘comfort zone’ is usually our ‘right path’… My advice would be to tune IN to your comfort zone to tap into your true essence and highest self… where any ‘hidden talents’ as mentioned here may be ‘discovered’… 🙂

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A comfort zone is psychological space where we feel the safest and find the most comfort.

It’s the style of living where everything is familiar and the challenges are so mundane that nothing can surprise us.

But if everything is familiar to you and nothing can surprise you than there is nothing new and exciting in your life either.

Even though comfort zones are a natural program we create to keep us safe with less energy input, sometimes they are our prison. They keep us safe as much as prison walls keep prisoners safe from the outside world.

In some cases, comfort zones might even be harmful to your health, and you’ll subconsciously assume you are safe, just because you are surrounded with the familiar unhealthy behaviors.

Humans are not meant to just stay safe. We are meant to live and living means sometimes we need to explore unknown territories, both outside and inside of ourselves.

Like a gold that keeps its shine with every polishing, so are human beings designed to shine with every pressure there is. Comfort zones couldn’t give us that.

But comfort zones are not bad as long as you have the courage to break out of them. In fact, that’s how you grow.

7 Character Evolving Benefits From Breaking Out of Your Comfort Zone

Here are the 7 most important character evolving benefits we get from breaking out of our comfort zones:

1. Outside of your comfort zone is where you feel most alive

Let’s travel back in time when you were still a kid. Remember the times you were scared of trying new things?

By doing the thing you were scared of, you felt the most alive. You learned something that stayed with you.

2. Breaking out of your comfort zone develops your character

As you grow older, you give more value on stability because stability promises you security.

But security does not develop you, finding security or creating it does.

You can do that only by exploring into the unknown, where things are not so familiar and you must think outside of your daily pattern.

And that’s how you develop new aspects of your character.

3. Outside of your comfort zone is where you find new passions and discover hidden talents

You are like a flower, and the real essence of who you are is covered by the leaves of the flower. As you go through life you open some leaves.

But most people open just a few, never realizing who they really are and what their potential really is.

By breaking out of your comfort zone you try new things and you open more and more from the flower.

You discover other aspects of yourself, other passions and different talents that you have. That’s how you find out your essence.

4. Breaking out of your comfort zone gives you new realms to explore

Spending more of your time with the same people, talking about the same topics with the same flow of reasoning may make you close-minded to all the other ways of living.

When you expose yourself to a different setting, another group of people, other opinions and cultures, you go to realms you never thought existed. Your mind opens up.

By doing the same routine every day you are living a mechanical existence. Your brain uses the same neurons and neural pathways.

The countless other neural pathways and potential neural connections stay dormant, all these other ways of seeing the world are unused.

But once you go to an unfamiliar territory to explore, your mind fully activates and you see things with a greater clarity.

In a way, you force your mind to use different neural pathways by changing the pattern.

You can try by just turning your phone off to focus on new things. It works wonders.

5. Escaping your comfort zone builds your self-confidence

Anxiety issues might arise by merely thinking of talking to strangers. But actually doing that is how you make the anxiety fade away from your life.

By trying new things you have never done before, it’s normal to feel a little afraid and have anxiety. That’s a healthy response to new situations.

However, being strong enough to not let those emotions decide for you is what builds your confidence.

By gaining experiences of situations where you were courageous enough, despite the outcome, you are giving yourself memories from where your self-esteem can arise.

The easier it is for you to get self-esteem, the stronger self-confidence you will have. And the stronger self-confidence you have, the less anxiety you will feel.

6. Getting out of your comfort zone makes you an interesting person

Amazing things start to happen once you break out of your comfort zone. Because they’re new, they’ll appear weird, crazy and epic.

These things are full with details and emotions. They shape great stories and interesting conversations with people.

People would always like to hear about your new adventure and the crazy things you encountered along the way.

Even if you are really bad at telling stories, just sharing your memories from outside of your comfort zone makes you a lot more interesting person than anyone who rarely escapes their comfort zone.

7. Outside of your comfort zone fills your heart and expands your spirit

When you spread your wings to fly, you’ll see different communities and worlds that exist. You get to learn from them. You discover new things.

There are a lot of sports, activities, foods, books, events and music to experience. There are countless places and people to get to know.

There are categories you can explore that you don’t even know are out there. The world is a much bigger place than you can even imagine.

You cannot explore all the art and all the beautiful creations people have given even if you try something new every second.

There is no logical reason to not do what fills your heart and expands your spirit, especially in today’s age when you can do almost everything through a device in your pocket.

Life is a gift. It’s such a waste to spend it in mundane routines and predictability.

Taking the first steps may seem terrifying. But that fear fades the moment you take action.

 

~via ConsciousReminder.com

 

Photo: “Comfort Zone” by Ascension Avatar