SUE MAISANO: “How To Daydream and Achieve Your Goals”

“Logic will get you from A to B. Imagination will take you everywhere.”

~Albert Einstein

 

Daydreaming is like meditation or hypnosis except for that it is more effortless and natural. Done properly, daydreaming can be very effective in helping us achieve our goals.

Your mind and body already know how to get into the zone of daydreaming because you had been doing it unconsciously all the time.

Perhaps when you are driving, the lengthy, repetitive and boring activity sends your mind to a space of peacefulness, or what seems like to be void and silent. With this quieting of the mind, you wander away from daily mundane and goes on a mental exploration. In other words, you started to daydream.

Everybody daydreams, it is human nature.

I had a daydream 15 years ago.

How could I remember a random daydream that long ago you ask? Well, the daydream I had seemed too foolish to me at the time, so it stood out and stuck with me. I remember I had to stop myself on the tracks and put on a mental break to get myself out of the daydream.

As a frustrated Chinese college student who wanted to come to America, I had a lot of worries, one of which was relationship. I didn’t have any relationship problems per se actually, because I had no one to have a relationship with, aka I was a desperate single.

One day as I was randomly strolling the campus on the walkway my mind slips away. Admit this light, glowing and pleasant feeling, I thought maybe I would marry an American guy one day and have a bunch of cute mixes.

I was not sure if I initiated the thought or the thought found me. I felt that the latter was more appropriate. The thought was soft and gentle, and it brought pleasant sensations. I was free from everyday struggles for a few brief seconds while I was bathed in the daydream.

Then my logical thinking kicked in. My inner voice said this was not possible so stop thinking like this and fool yourself. I brought myself out of the daydream by deciding to focus on something more “practical”.

Nevertheless, that daydream was realized years later, against all odds.

Many inventions, scientific breakthroughs and writings were conceived in the daydream like state.

Einstein came up with the Special Theory of Relativity in daydreams. His saying that “Imagination is more important than knowledge” further testifies the importance of imagination and daydreaming.

Edison kept a small bed in his office where he daydreamed about his next inventions. If not for his immense creativity the world might still be a “dark” place.

And as your mind and body grow accustomed to a certain amount of sleep each night — six hours, seven, maybe the recommended eight — so can you train your waking mind to sleep creatively and work out the vividly imagined waking dreams which are successful works of fiction.”

You see, great minds recognize the importance of imagination and daydream to bring out creativity as well as accomplish personal goals.

How to use daydreaming to reach your goals?

Daydreaming is a state of being that we naturally go through each day. You can choose to purposefully daydream and raise your vibrations. When you daydream, you somewhat detach from the physical and access higher planes where energies can manifest into physical existence. You start to tap into the source where physical realities spring from. In other words, you become more creative.

Practicing entering the daydream space purposefully will help you draw closer what you desire. Here are a few steps to help you initiate and deepen your daydream abilities:

1. Find a quiet space.

Daydreaming is a type of “dream” so treat it like a dream. When you go to sleep each night, you put on your soft pajamas, retreat to your bed, cover yourself with warm blankets, and turn off the light. You close your eyes and side aside the day’s happenings.

You drop deeper and deeper into sleep where dreams may occur. You do it at each night at around the same time, same place, same procedures that it’s almost like a ritual. Similarly, with a daydream you need a quiet space, especially a quiet mental space where you can safely set aside the daily mundane.

Find a time and place where you won’t be constantly interrupted. Maybe take a short walk in the woods or on a trail. Maybe use the mental space in the soothing shower in the morning. Maybe it’s a place in your house where you feel comfortable for your daily daydreaming. Wouldn’t be a bad idea to daydream first when you go to bed each night.

2. Let go of logical thinking.

Sometimes you dream of your deceased relatives, but in that dream it may not occur to you that your relative had already passed. Sometimes in your dream you have a completely different identity than what you are in your waking hours. However, the dream self does not question its own validity.

It’s because your logical thinking is in suspension when you are in a dream. You are free from your logical restrictions. Your imagination grows wings when you dream. Similarly, when you daydream, suspend your logical thinking. Einstein said: “Logic will get you from A to B. Imagination will take you everywhere.”

If your logical thinking is interfering with your daydream you certainly are restricted and won’t be able to access the Universal energy with unlimited potential. In fact, you won’t even be able to daydream if you cannot let go of your logical thinking for even a brief moment.

Of course that is not to deny the power of your logical thinking at other times. What you need to practice on is to let go of logical thinking when you intent to do so. It’s a mental discipline to direct your will.

3. Let go of expectations.

After your daydream, carry out your daily activities as if nothing had happened. Don’t become obsessed with what you daydreamed about. When you do the actual daydreaming, you are delivering your message to the Universe. The Universe is always hearing and responding, and it initiates motion, which may not be visible on the physical plane, towards manifestations of your dream.

Let go of expectations is to allow it to happen and is perhaps the hardest part of bringing your daydream to reality. For everything we do we tend to cast our bet, our preferences of how things should go. If things go our way we are happy, if things are going against us we are worried. Our emotions are greatly controlled by what’s happening outside of us. We truly become a victim with no control.

We entangle ourselves in the process of creation and block the process of manifestation. What we are doing is to compare the outside happenings with what we hold in our expectations and we see this discrepancy. We then mess the process of creation with our negative emotions, further pushing our dream reality away from us.

It’s a downward spiral. With letting go of expectations we lose the comparison. Then the outside happenings become neither good nor bad because we don’t cast our bets, our preferences. This level of letting go allows the Universal energy to proceed naturally without any restrictions.

Then all of a sudden, when you are least expecting it your dream become a reality in a magical way! By then you might have already forgot that once you daydreamed about it. Such is the beauty of letting go of expectations.

Now you have it, three steps to bring your daydream to reality. Find a quiet space, let go of logical thinking, and let go of expectation. Which one do you think is the easiest? Which one do you think is the hardest part? Can you let go, even just a little bit? What are you daydreaming today?

 

~via ConsciousReminder.com

JEREMIAH STEPHEN (HeartSphere): “Voices”

“To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.”

― Ralph Waldo Emerson

 

Life teems with choice and decision. Some are difficult, while others are easy. Some test the loom upon which the very fabric of our lives is woven. And upon the precipice of choice we may also find resounding voices–those that are not our own.

We all come to these critical points as we dwell within the many spheres that visit our lives.

All decisions affect not only our life, but the lives of others as well. The choice of food that we nourish our bodies with has consequences that can be witnessed in minutes, and others that may not be seen for many years. Our choice of words can immediately defeat or uplift a stranger, a loved one or a friend. And our choice of actions may alter the course of world history, or at the very least, our own personal history.

But many of these choices are made almost involuntarily, influenced by thoughts that do not belong to our hearts.

I used to be worried about every move that I ever made, about every word that I would utter and every action that I took. I wasn’t worried about the causal outcome of my words or actions, but of the response from those around me. In doing this, I placed myself into a protective shell that grew dense over many years. And many of us are familiar with this.

I was called shy, withdrawn, reserved, introverted and anti-social. But this was never who I truly was. I felt comfortable being quiet, so I stayed where I found comfort.

But the day came when I no longer visited those thoughts that brought me worry. I found strength in my own hands, through creative pleasure and my own God-given gifts. I realized that I only worried over my perception of another person’s perception. It was my own thoughts that worried me, and nothing else.

Then I realized one beautiful truth…

Don’t believe everything that you think.

Today, I embrace who I am. I speak my deepest thoughts, and am not afraid to share my life with anyone. Of course I’m still full of cynicism, sarcasm and a host of other idiosyncrasies, but who isn’t?

I’ve made countless choices that have taught me great truth, and if anyone asked me to correct anything in my past, I can honestly say the thought itself is impossible.

Because everything that I’ve done has brought me here, to this moment.

Had I not decided to move to a new place instead of staying home, I may not have a daughter. Had I chosen to stay just one day longer in Colorado, I may not have a son. So revisiting my perceived past “what-if’s” or otherwise “difficult” choices brings me to knowing that my options were on my path for a reason.

As is everything… And everyone.

We should be wise to not give our choices up to the resounding doubt that speaks to us from the dark corners of the mind. We should never step out of our own light to appease the shadows of a crowd, or to play it safe and stay comfortable in a hardened shell made of our own mind’s treachery.

These are lessons that I’ve learned, and though I am where I am in life because of choices I’ve made from these metrics, I’ve come far from the mist that once covered the hidden garden. I now choose wisely, and listen to my heart as it softly speaks.

I wish all to hear their true voice, and to be sound and content in speaking their own truth as it should be done by one’s own accord.

Life is full of Choices…

And full of Voices…

So, choose wisely.

And Speak your Own.

 

~via TheHeartSphere.com

MATEO SOL: “6 Signs You’re Experiencing Spiritual Maturity”

In our society, we have a very two dimensional understanding of maturity. Most people define it as an accumulation of experiences that come through the process of aging. But this isn’t really true.

The truth is that maturity has very little to do with our external experiences, and everything to do with our inner processing of the world. Yes, you might have experienced a lot of challenges and hardships in life, but if you weren’t present and aware of what was happening and the way in which it could help you to learn and grow, all of your experiences simply turned into moments where you unconsciously and emotionally reacted, not maturing at all.

While we have no control over aging, we do play a part in our ability to mature. Maturity is something that comes with conscious intent; something that evolves as we become more aware. It isn’t how “knowledgeable” or “smart” we are either, as knowledge is a product of past fears, mental patterns, memories, reactions and illusory concepts of the self.

Instead, true maturity is the state of being internally free enough to respond consciously, to be responsible enough to see the end result our thoughts, feelings and actions and how they will affect ourselves, others and the world at large.

Developing true maturity impacts so many different areas of our lives. Below I elaborate:

1. Maturity is Courageous

Maturity involves inner freedom and freedom is the result of having courage — the courage to think differently and behave differently.

In a society that considers “maturity” as the pursuit of careers, spouses, mortgages, children and materialism, it takes immense courage to truly be mature and to pursue a path with heart, reconnecting with our authentic selves.

2. Maturity is Honest

Many people avoid the truth of who they really are by piling on beliefs, labels and roles in their lives and clinging to them. However, the mature person, in their lifelong pursuit of self-discovery comes to see all the ways in which they deceive themselves into a false sense of being.

Common examples of spiritual immaturity involve avoiding the shadow elements of human nature, believing that we have transcended our “lower selves” and are in touch with our “higher selves” and confusing the fearful voices of our core wounds with our intuition.

3. Maturity is Loving

Most people’s idea of love is to love only to receive love. “I need you to love me so I can love you back” is not a very mature way of loving. To be mature means that you can love someone unconditionally, even if they don’t love you back because your own self-love is more than enough.

The spiritually mature person loves because the state of love expands their limited sense of self and reconnects them with the divine. They don’t just love to be reassured that they are lovable by another.

And if the other person is mature enough to love back the same way, the love becomes even more powerful.

You’ll often come across people that hold love as the highest possible spiritual form, which it is. But to experience that love you must first have attained the personal freedom and responsibility that is necessary to unconditionally love.

4. Maturity is Compassionate

Many religions will teach you to do “good” out of duty through pity and sympathy (both include feeling sorry for another because they are in a position inferiority to you), as opposed to empathy when you can feel and understand their pain as equals. Many are compassionate also out of the underlying stimulus and promise of “rewards” in the afterlife. However, this is completely destructive and a perfect example of immaturity.

The spiritually mature person doesn’t act from a place of dutifully needing “to do good” which is tainted with all kinds of unconscious desires such as self-gratification, power, prestige and control. To do any mature charitable act, our motivation must come from a place of inner peace and freedom.

5. Maturity is Forgiving

Resenting other people is addictive. It gives us a false sense of power by believing that we are protecting ourselves from getting hurt again, and we are on the “moral high ground.” It tricks us into an unhealthy sense of self-importance; “I’ll never forgive you. What you did to ME was UNFORGIVABLE.” It is yet another way in which our misery and self-pity make us happy.

True forgiveness, on the other hand, involves taking responsibility for ourselves and making the decision to no longer attempt to justify or attach ourselves to feelings of hatred and anger. We are aware enough to know how damaging such heavy feelings are to us and the quality of our lives.

6. Maturity is Accepting

Maturity involves knowing what you can change and accept that which you can’t. A person who lives in a constant state of conflict with the world is one who is enslaved to their own internal reactions. They are not free to respond.

I am often confronted by people who ask me how I can be so at peace with the state of affairs in the world; the injustice, the chaos, the inequality that saddens them to the point of depression or feeling like their sensitive natures don’t belong to this world.

This is closely tied with the forgiveness I mentioned above. I’m not OK with the injustice of the world, but I don’t resist it either. I’m aware enough to realize that change can never, and has never, come from an external system, but from an individual internal decision. To be able to help the collective maturity evolve I must first be able to accept and acknowledge the mess that we are in without resisting it and running away into my self-righteous ideals, without judging it and condemning others so as to make them defensive and lose receptivity to my message.

You can’t cure the turmoil of the world when you’re acting from a place of inner turmoil. The acceptance of yourself and acceptance of others is like learning how to flow in a stream without ending up like another solid pebble at the bottom of the river.

The spiritual awakening process of maturity is the beginning of the journey of inner blossoming; it is the beginning of the journey toward the fulfillment of your own potential. Coming to truly know that potential means knowing that you require equal part sun as you do soil in order to be grounded, but to dance in the wind as well.

 

~via WakeUp-World.com

MARION SELISTA: “15 Keys To Unleash Your True Authentic Self”

Every person is unique and has something to offer the world. Being authentic means embracing who you are and accepting your uniqueness.

However, being the real you is a challenge to most people because they either don’t know how to connect with their true self or how to unleash it. You are always trying to please others, and live up to society’s expectations, forgetting yourself.

When you finally make yourself a priority, that’s when your life starts. You honor yourself by unleashing your true self. You can now say NO to things and people that do not serve you.

Here’s how you can unleash your true authentic self by using the below 15 key ways.

1. Hello, it is you

Being real starts with discovering who you are deep at the core; what you stand for; your strengths and weaknesses; your passion; and what makes you happy. Knowing yourself will make you happy and experience less inner conflict thus make better decisions. You can also resist social pressure and understand others which makes you a better individual.

2. Self-acceptance

What you think of yourself is shaped over the years by both positive and negative experiences. You will be on the path to self-acceptance when you start restructuring the way you view yourself. You must learn to admit your flaws, and accept what you can’t change. Always set small goals every day, never give up and surround yourself with positivity.

3. Reframe your life according to your principles

The expectations placed on you by society are challenging to live up to. Reframe your life by creating rules for yourself that match your values. Focus on self-care and things that bring the best in you. You will no longer have to follow what everyone expects and can take charge of your life.

4. Meditate

Meditation is a very effective method of unleashing your true self. It draws you into a place deep within yourself for self-reflection and awareness hence giving you a push in the right direction. Daily meditation can result in a rewiring of your brain allowing the decreasing stress and tension.

5. Follow your bliss

You get increased happiness and satisfaction when you do what makes you happy. Doing what you love gives you a sense of purpose and belonging, clear objectivity and self-awareness. Identify what you are genuinely passionate about and give yourself to it thus unleash your true self.

6. Find your purpose

You find your place in life when you identify the reasons for your actions and set meaningful goals. It keeps you motivated throughout your life and you remain focused on meeting them.

7. Don’t look for external approval

Seeking external validation is a burden and affects your decisions in your life. Stop letting the outside world dictate your opinions or actions. Your dreams don’t have to be acceptable to everyone. You will be happier living by your beliefs.

8. Practice gratitude

Being a grateful person has numerous benefits; it makes your life easier, happier, and healthier both physically and psychologically. You look at life with a positive attitude. You can maintain excellent relationships with others. Practice it through; letters of appreciation when someone does a good thing for you; sharing with family everything you are grateful for during meals; Writing on paper what you are thankful for and putting it in a jar; keep a journal of things you are thankful for and not taking what you have for granted.

9. Be present

You embrace the real you when you start living in the present and avoid obsessing about the past. Enjoy every moment.

10. Compare yourself to you only

Comparing yourself to others only results in evaluating and rating yourself by chasing symbols of status and success. Unlock your authentic self by accepting yourself the way you are and measuring yourself by your standards.

11. Become your best self

Master these three elements that make you the best you can be;

Connectedness appreciate what you have now by showing love for what you have and don’t take anything for granted.

Calm observe your thoughts as they pass through your mind by staying calm.

Motivation — understanding the reason you do the things you do will spur you to continue striving to accomplish your objective.

12. Love

People often ridicule and give you a strange look when you are authentic. Self-love entails accepting and expressing your true self. It involves loving yourself and living life to the fullest just the way you are. You can’t give love if you don’t love yourself first.

13. Trust

Follow your wisdom and gut instead of looking externally for inner peace. Avoid seeking others’ opinions and get guidance from within yourself. Honor your emotions instead of hiding them thus unleashing the real you.

14. Authenticity

If you can’t be yourself, who else can you be? Connect with your inner self. It involves letting go of the false identity of who you think you should be and instead allowing the real you to emerge.

15. Affirmation

Affirmations are very easy and powerful to use. They train your mind through repetition and positive encouragement to connect to yourself. It entails thinking good thoughts, expressing who you are, taking actions to meet your needs and doing what you want. It builds self-esteem and unleashes your true self.

Final words

Learning to unleash your true authentic self is not an easy task- though it is a rewarding challenge. You discover yourself; identify your true passions; let go of past mistakes and accept yourself. You break free from crippling self-doubts and love yourself just the way you are. Being the real you helps you find your purpose, build your self-esteem; and brings you happiness in life.

 

~via ConsciousReminder.com

LIVE BOLD & BLOOM: “12 Of The Most Important Values To Live By”

What values are important to a life well-lived?

What do you want to be known for? What qualities do you admire in others and work to cultivate in yourself?

And how do those qualities reflect your core beliefs?

Your life values are those that, once you identify them, help you with decision-making and provide the building blocks for your character — specifically the one you want to have.

For example, if one of your top value in life is courage, you’ll likely seek out new challenges so you can act in spite of the fear that comes when you’re faced with the possibility of failure or rejection.

And if forgiveness has recently become one of your values to live by, you’ll want to remind yourself of your new commitment when you’re about to spend time with someone who has hurt you in the past.

But what is the point of identifying your values, and how do they contribute to your growth and happiness?

To answer this question, we’re exploring 12 of the most important values in life and showing how they influence everything you do.

But before we do that, it makes sense to explain what values are in the first place.

What Are Values in Life?

Values are about what you consider important to the life you want to live. They inform your priorities and, when practiced consistently, form the character you want to have.

They’re rooted in your core beliefs about what makes for a life well-lived and about the behavior you want to model for others (including children if you have them).

Shared values are the basis for a common code – a value-based compass – that speeds up decision-making and unites those who share that code.

By expressing those values, the common code articulates different aspects of the shared mission and becomes the key motivator for those who share it.

You can take each of the following examples of values in life to create a code or motto that motivates you to practice that value every day, so it will become second nature when it’s most needed.

12 Most Important Values To Life By

 

1. Courage

Courage is about doing what you believe needs to be done — not in the absence of fear but in spite of it.

You might feel disinclined to offer a genuine apology out of fear that the other will reject it, but courage will help you apologize anyway, because it’s the right thing to do, out of respect for the one you hurt or offended. Whether they accept your apology or not is their business.

Courage requires a step outside of your comfort zone. If you have no fear, you don’t need courage, but when something you know you have to do makes you feel sick inside, courage is what makes you do that thing anyway.

Courage code: “I do what needs to be done, even if fear comes along for the ride.”

2. Kindness

Kindness is about treating others the way you want to be treated.

It’s more than just holding your tongue when you’re tempted to say something unkind; kindness looks for ways to make life better for others. It takes delight in lifting others up and reminding them they’re not alone, invisible, or insignificant.

Kindness and compassion are closely related; the latter involves the readiness to see a situation from someone else’s perspective and to give them the benefit of the doubt. It also takes into consideration what the other person has gone through and chooses to respond with kindness rather than anger or vengefulness.

Both demonstrate at least a subliminal appreciation for the connectedness of all living beings; when you show kindness and compassion to others, you benefit (at least) as much as they do.

Kindness to yourself is also important, and it’s the basis for self-care. Don’t forget to be as kind to yourself as you want others to be.

Schedule time each day for reasonable and thoughtful self-care, and practice mindfulness to be fully present for it. In practicing kindness to yourself, you also make yourself better able to render kindness to others.

Kindness code: “I treat others as I want to be treated — with thoughtfulness, patience, and respect.”

3. Patience

When someone is pushing your buttons, taking your time or attention away from something you want to finish, or making your life harder in some way, you practice patience by putting yourself in the others’ shoes, trying to see the situation from their perspective, and responding with kindness and respect.

No one wants to be treated like an inconvenience or a burden, and sometimes your priorities have to change to make room for something (or someone) more important or more likely to help you grow.

Patience code: “No matter how I feel when someone interrupts me or gets in my way, I always treat them with the same patience I hope for from others when necessity compels me to interrupt them or get in their way.”

4. Integrity

Integrity is about acting and speaking in accordance with your beliefs.

If you say one thing but do the opposite, witnesses to this contradiction aren’t likely to recognize you as a person of integrity. They’re more likely to accuse you of hypocrisy.

Though you may not be fully conscious of the disagreement between your words and actions, if you believe one thing but your actions profess a contradictory belief, you might feel a growing unease and unhappiness with the way you’re acting.

It doesn’t feel right. And you’re faced with a choice: either change your belief, or change your actions.

Integrity code: “What I believe is made clear by what I say and do.”

5. Gratitude / Appreciation

When gratitude is a core belief, you make time for it every day. You prioritize both feeling gratitude and expressing it — in your thoughts, in the words you speak or write, and in your attitude and actions.

You might create the habit of writing a daily gratitude list. And if you recognize the importance of emotion to the fullest experience of gratitude, you’ll likewise place a high value on a daily mindfulness practice.

Showing appreciation to others for their words and actions is also essential to making this a core value. Just as you appreciate it when others thank you for a job well done, for a thoughtful gift, or for rendering the help they needed, others appreciate that recognition too.

And far too often, we act as though others must already know how much we appreciate them. Don’t assume that they do; make sure of it.

Gratitude code: “In the morning, throughout the day, and in the evening, I feel and express gratitude for the good things in my life. And I make sure everyone who has done something good for me knows I appreciate them for it.”

6. Forgiveness

Forgiveness is about letting go of anger and resentment toward those who have hurt or offended you.

You’re not saying what they did was okay or not a big deal; you’re acknowledging that what they did was hurtful but choosing to forgive them in order to be free of the anger and resentment (toward them) that are making you miserable.

In forgiving them, you take back your power and choose happiness and peace of soul for yourself, even if the one who hurt you has never shown the slightest hint of remorse.

Everyone has a capacity for forgiveness — just as everyone has the capacity to hurt others with their words and actions — but not everyone has cultivated a habit of forgiveness.

We learn to be more forgiving by forgiving more. If you write morning pages, add a short list of people you forgive, adding what you forgive them for and something you appreciate about each person.

Forgiveness code: “I forgive those who have hurt me, because I know I’ve made mistakes and hurt people, too, and I want to be free of this anger and resentment. I choose freedom, and I choose to genuinely want (and work for) the good of those who’ve hurt me.”

7. Love

Love sees the good in everyone, and it wants good things for them. You may not always know what’s best for someone else, but if you love them, you want their ultimate happiness, and you want to see them grow.

You recognize that no one reaches adulthood with their character fixed and unchangeable; we’re all a work in progress. Things your 20-year-old self would say might appall your 40-year-old self. It’s part of being human if you’re a human that continues to grow.

Did someone you love do terrible things in their 20’s or 30’s — things they would never do now (in their mid-40’s)?

Forgive them for not knowing better before they learned whatever stopped them from doing those terrible things. And forgive yourself for not knowing that human beings are all capable of terrible things — just as we’re also capable of growth.

When you love someone, you don’t base that love on the kind of person they were ten or twenty years ago, or on the person, you hope they become or that you wish they were. Your love tells them, “You are enough — just as you are today.”

You recognize that their beliefs and behavior may change as they grow, but since your love doesn’t depend on what they believe or on whether you agree on everything, your love doesn’t lessen with time and with the challenges those changes bring.

Love code: “I love with both passion and understanding; real love is wide awake.”

8. Growth

If growth is one of your core values, you look for opportunities to grow as a person and to help others grow, too.

You take the time to identify your values and your overall mission, so you can live in accordance with it and become more and more the person you have to be in order to fulfill your mission.

You know that growth isn’t a destination but a process, and you want to enjoy that process and help others to enjoy their own.

You might take an interest in coaching or in group growth opportunities, where members support and encourage each other. You recognize true and wholehearted collaboration as an asset and a growth facilitator, and you prioritize growth over comfort and security.

Real growth might mean shaking things up at home or at work, but the more committed you are to your growth and to that of those you care about, the less you mind rocking the boat.

Growth code: “Every day, I’m growing more into the person I want to be.”

9. Listening

If active listening is a core value for you, you value others’ input and invest time and energy in learning how to see things from their perspectives.

So, it makes sense that when someone wants to tell you something, you give them your full attention and thoughtfully consider their words.

Whereas before you felt tense with the expectation of having to defend your beliefs against an unfriendly viewpoint, you’ve learned (through practice) to listen with genuine openness rather than an ego-centric fear of being proven wrong.

You recognize that you don’t know everything, and you don’t see even familiar things from every angle, so you appreciate it when others share their perspectives. And your body language as well as your feedback shows them you’re listening and that you care about what they have to say.

Listening code: “I listen to others with my full attention, so I can learn from them and show thoughtful consideration for their ideas.”

10. Respect

If you want to be known for treating all human (or living) beings with respect, you probably base that respect on something more fundamental than someone’s rank or social status.

Otherwise, why would you consider it a priority to treat all humans with equal respect — regardless of their age, income, or background?

Or why would you put more energy into making sure the least exalted among you is treated with respect than into making sure others treat you with the same consideration.

It doesn’t mean you don’t consider yourself equally worthy of respect, but you find it easy to put yourself in other people’s shoes, so in making sure they feel respected, you feel more respected, too.

Respect code: “I treat all living beings with the same respect with which I like to be treated.”

11. Self-Giving

Another word for self-giving is sacrifice, but self-giving has a more positive connotation. Essentially, you’re giving of yourself — your time, your attention, your energy, your treasure, your abilities — to help or enrich another.

Real love doesn’t hesitate to give of itself until it hurts, knowing that the momentary pain is nothing compared to the benefit won by that self-giving.

The word “selfless” implies that someone has given so much of themselves, they’ve reserved nothing for their own use or enjoyment, but in giving yourself — if you give out of love — your joy is in what that gift brings to others.

Self-giving can be overdone but only when the motive is pride (or insecurity) rather than love.

Self-giving code: “I give of myself to others not only to connect with them but to acknowledge our connectedness. What I give to them, I also receive.”

12. Vision

You may be used to talking about vision in the context of a specific person’s “vision for the future,” but the larger sense of vision is not something that you own or that comes from you; it comes through you and inspires you and others.

Because the larger vision isn’t confined to your ego, the power of that vision is free to attract, illuminate, and flow through you.

Your vision is connected to one that is infinite and uncontainable — you do not exist to serve yourself at the expense of others; you exist to cooperate with others in the creation of a community that benefits all living creatures.

Your personal vision — what you see as your response to the larger vision — informs your personal mission and the process by which you live out that mission.

It’s not about the lifestyle you want or the things you’ll have when you’re “successful.” It has more to do with allowing yourself to be led by the greater vision through your personal links to it — your intuition and inner wisdom.

Vision code: “I live according to a vision guided by my inner wisdom and judgment.”

Now, it’s your turn.

What are your values? And what will you do today to put one (or more) of them into practice?

One small action today makes more of a difference than you probably realize.

Think of each small action as a seed you plant that, as long as you nurture it along the way, grows into a healthy tree with roots and branches, shedding seeds of its own.

Your values are the life in every seed you plant. Choose the best values, and make them part of your blueprint for personal growth.

And may your courage and passion for growth influence everything you do today.

 

~via LiveBoldandBloom.com

DEJAN DAVCEVSKI: “The 3 Best Mental Tools You Already Have That Will Help You Build A Better Life”

Most of us know how we want to live. We know exactly what we need to do, maybe even how, and yet less than 1% of the people are living on their terms. Why is this?

The short answer is that people lack proper education, nobody has told them that there are mental tools they can learn to use, nobody has showed them how.

Just like you need tools to build, for example a house, you need mental tools to build the reality you want to live in.

There are countless mental tools developed by people who were in desperate need of them. These people needed these tools so much that they created them to help themselves.

Before you go out exploring all the existing mental tools, here are the 3 best and most essential ones you will need to create a better life for yourself.

The 3 Best Mental Tools To Build Better Life:


1. The 5 Second Rule.

Most of you know “The 5 Second Rule” to be something that applies to food that you might have dropped. But this is a different rule.

This is a mental tool developed by TV host, author and motivational speaker Mel Robbins and it’s the main thing that helped her rise even higher when she was hitting rock bottom.

This so called “5 Second Rule” is really simple. All it means is that whenever you want, or need, or should do something, count from 5 to 1 and lift off into action.

Mel first started using this mental tool in the mornings, when she felt like not getting out of bed. She started counting 5, 4, 3, 2, 1, and on 1, without thinking, she just got up.

The truth is, you will never going to feel like it’s the perfect moment for taking action. However, with this simple tool you will have mental leverage to launch yourself into action.

2. Turn ANTs Into PETs.

So, of course, we are not talking about actual ants. ANT is short for Automatic Negative Thoughts and PET is short for Positive Encouraging Thoughts.

Dr. Daniel G. Amen got the idea when his home was infested with ants. He looked at the real ants and realized that most people have minds that are infested with negative thoughts.

Most of us think the same 90% of the thoughts every day, and most of these thoughts are negative. There are over 20 mental distortions that twist our reality to seem more negative.

There is an easy tool that Dr. Daniel developed, to turn ANTs into PETs, and it’s in a form of asking yourself 5 simple questions whenever you notice a negative thought.

Is the negative thought true? Can I absolutely know that it is true? How do I react when I feel this thought? Who would I be without this thought? What’s the opposite thought?

3. What’s Pulling, What’s Pushing?

If you are like most of us, you have had a dilemma when you didn’t know what to choose between two or more choices. Most of us have such dilemmas daily.

And this is normal. However, most people don’t really know how to choose the best out of all their conflicting options.

There is a simple mental tool you can use, in a form of 2 simple questions that will clarify so many things for you.

Whenever in a dilemma between two choices ask yourself “What’s pulling me in that direction, love or fear, abundance or scarcity?”

Now ask yourself “What’s pushing me in the opposite direction, love or fear, abundance or scarcity?” Choose the options that are inspired by abundance and love.

 

~via LifeCoachCode.com

CONSCIOUS REMINDER: Staying Present In The Now — Here’s What You Can Do To Pursue Your Dreams”

Every one of you has probably noticed that regardless of how hard you try, you cannot make your long-run plans anymore. It just means that when you try even harder, you will probably make certain things happen.

However, today’s lives are not working in that way anymore. Instead of making plans and then working hard on them, you are guided to ask for someone to guide you and set your intentions about the following two or three steps towards that same intentions.

However, unless that guidance comes, nothing is going to work well, no matter what you do.

“Making the things work” ended.

The time of ‘making the things work’ has ended. Are you waiting for your guidance to show up? Are you permitting your life to open out just as it is going to? For a lot of people, this may seem like you are standing still.

However, when you remain still for a more extended period, you can notice that the approach does not mean not taking any action, but it is simply about staying here and be present, to every level of your knowing and being.

Staying very present is aware action.

When you stay present at every level means that you are taking conscious action. So, it will allow you to be right in that present moment — entirely.

It is going to put your focus here and right now. You will look toward your future, but you are not really overlooking what happens now, as you are quite busy as you focus on far off goals.

To be and remain present will allow your soul to come next to you entirely. So, this is the place from where guidance of everything you have to do appears — your soul.

Your soul wants to be the creator of your life.

Your soul wants to live inside you and through you. This is the reason why it creates the conditions which require you to widely open to it.

Also, that is why your soul drives the shift in your human experience. It wants to create your life with you. It also intends to be the co-creator of your life and even the rest of this world.

It seems like the soul has conspired. It does not let your long-term plan to work as you want, as it wants you to become more present and long enough, so it may come into you more entirely.

Deep breathing, meditating, or journalling are some things which you can do in order to connect with your soul and also become profoundly present. A lot of people do these things or take actions in this simple way.

What is going to happen when there is a specific thing waiting inside our imagination, and which desires to actually be born within us?

Usually, it may feel as our difficulties can make our dreams look like they are impossible to happen, so we will not believe that it will occur for us. Also, it can look like the ones that achieved higher levels of success actually have a better, to begin with than other people have.

But, success cannot come overnight, although every one of us has the chance to achieve it. When we faced tough times and struggles, most of us that were successful started bad and also experienced heartbreaking difficulties and struggles first, and that made us find the other self that transformed us.

So, at times we feel like we are not getting anywhere, we should not surrender, because the dream and idea were planted in our minds for some specific reason and it is all on us to show it — we can do it!

We should not get bitter, but get BETTER.

At a time of misfortune and rough times, we will probably think why us?

However, those times do not imply that we need to be stuck there forever. Tough and difficult times occur to every one of us, and the way we overcome those times is what later on determines our lives. Sometimes, such times can destroy us and lead us to take become addicts of drugs and alcohol. However, when such strong emotions may get focused on our purpose and dreams and gain a more constructive form, it will be time when every single thing may turn around.

A person named Helen Keller, the one that was born blind, deaf and dumb, and who marked the history of the great of life, is actually the evidence that regardless of the circumstances, a person can never be defeated.

 

“Every single failure or traumatic experience can come with a seed of equivalent success.”

 ~Napoleon Hill

 

The person who changed this whole world, as he invented cars, named Henry Ford, comes from a family that was uneducated and poor. However, he was working with everything he possessed, and he never waited for something to occur by chance. Instead, he followed his dreams, so the world also changed as a result of his great work. Moreover, Thomas Edison has failed about 10,000 or more times, without giving up of his dream.

There is just one difference between the ones that succeed and the ones that don’t, and that is never surrendering.

Here, we will present you the six steps to make your dreams become a reality.

The six steps for specific goals by Thomas Edison:

1. Focus on your mind and the most particular thing you desire.

2. Think about what would you like and try to do and give in order to get what you want.

3. Schedule the event.

4. Write openly about what you really want, put the right time, and mention what you have the intention to give — then, describe all that clearly.

5. Then, read that statement two times a day prior to going to sleep, and also when you wake up.

6. In the end, convince yourself about it being yours.

We are not supposed to wait for chance or luck, because everyone that succeeds what he or she wanted did that with great hope, and wishing and also mental work prior to acquiring it.

 

~via ConsciousReminder.com

CONSCIOUS REMINDER: “7 Benefits From Stepping Out Of Your Comfort Zone”

Ascension Avatar: A double-Pisces with Cancer ascending like myself might disagree about ‘stepping out’ of the comfort zone since that ‘comfort zone’ is usually our ‘right path’… My advice would be to tune IN to your comfort zone to tap into your true essence and highest self… where any ‘hidden talents’ as mentioned here may be ‘discovered’… 🙂

.  .  .

 

A comfort zone is psychological space where we feel the safest and find the most comfort.

It’s the style of living where everything is familiar and the challenges are so mundane that nothing can surprise us.

But if everything is familiar to you and nothing can surprise you than there is nothing new and exciting in your life either.

Even though comfort zones are a natural program we create to keep us safe with less energy input, sometimes they are our prison. They keep us safe as much as prison walls keep prisoners safe from the outside world.

In some cases, comfort zones might even be harmful to your health, and you’ll subconsciously assume you are safe, just because you are surrounded with the familiar unhealthy behaviors.

Humans are not meant to just stay safe. We are meant to live and living means sometimes we need to explore unknown territories, both outside and inside of ourselves.

Like a gold that keeps its shine with every polishing, so are human beings designed to shine with every pressure there is. Comfort zones couldn’t give us that.

But comfort zones are not bad as long as you have the courage to break out of them. In fact, that’s how you grow.

7 Character Evolving Benefits From Breaking Out of Your Comfort Zone

Here are the 7 most important character evolving benefits we get from breaking out of our comfort zones:

1. Outside of your comfort zone is where you feel most alive

Let’s travel back in time when you were still a kid. Remember the times you were scared of trying new things?

By doing the thing you were scared of, you felt the most alive. You learned something that stayed with you.

2. Breaking out of your comfort zone develops your character

As you grow older, you give more value on stability because stability promises you security.

But security does not develop you, finding security or creating it does.

You can do that only by exploring into the unknown, where things are not so familiar and you must think outside of your daily pattern.

And that’s how you develop new aspects of your character.

3. Outside of your comfort zone is where you find new passions and discover hidden talents

You are like a flower, and the real essence of who you are is covered by the leaves of the flower. As you go through life you open some leaves.

But most people open just a few, never realizing who they really are and what their potential really is.

By breaking out of your comfort zone you try new things and you open more and more from the flower.

You discover other aspects of yourself, other passions and different talents that you have. That’s how you find out your essence.

4. Breaking out of your comfort zone gives you new realms to explore

Spending more of your time with the same people, talking about the same topics with the same flow of reasoning may make you close-minded to all the other ways of living.

When you expose yourself to a different setting, another group of people, other opinions and cultures, you go to realms you never thought existed. Your mind opens up.

By doing the same routine every day you are living a mechanical existence. Your brain uses the same neurons and neural pathways.

The countless other neural pathways and potential neural connections stay dormant, all these other ways of seeing the world are unused.

But once you go to an unfamiliar territory to explore, your mind fully activates and you see things with a greater clarity.

In a way, you force your mind to use different neural pathways by changing the pattern.

You can try by just turning your phone off to focus on new things. It works wonders.

5. Escaping your comfort zone builds your self-confidence

Anxiety issues might arise by merely thinking of talking to strangers. But actually doing that is how you make the anxiety fade away from your life.

By trying new things you have never done before, it’s normal to feel a little afraid and have anxiety. That’s a healthy response to new situations.

However, being strong enough to not let those emotions decide for you is what builds your confidence.

By gaining experiences of situations where you were courageous enough, despite the outcome, you are giving yourself memories from where your self-esteem can arise.

The easier it is for you to get self-esteem, the stronger self-confidence you will have. And the stronger self-confidence you have, the less anxiety you will feel.

6. Getting out of your comfort zone makes you an interesting person

Amazing things start to happen once you break out of your comfort zone. Because they’re new, they’ll appear weird, crazy and epic.

These things are full with details and emotions. They shape great stories and interesting conversations with people.

People would always like to hear about your new adventure and the crazy things you encountered along the way.

Even if you are really bad at telling stories, just sharing your memories from outside of your comfort zone makes you a lot more interesting person than anyone who rarely escapes their comfort zone.

7. Outside of your comfort zone fills your heart and expands your spirit

When you spread your wings to fly, you’ll see different communities and worlds that exist. You get to learn from them. You discover new things.

There are a lot of sports, activities, foods, books, events and music to experience. There are countless places and people to get to know.

There are categories you can explore that you don’t even know are out there. The world is a much bigger place than you can even imagine.

You cannot explore all the art and all the beautiful creations people have given even if you try something new every second.

There is no logical reason to not do what fills your heart and expands your spirit, especially in today’s age when you can do almost everything through a device in your pocket.

Life is a gift. It’s such a waste to spend it in mundane routines and predictability.

Taking the first steps may seem terrifying. But that fear fades the moment you take action.

 

~via ConsciousReminder.com

 

Photo: “Comfort Zone” by Ascension Avatar

STACY VAJTA: “How Do You Know What Is Truly Aligned With You?”

There’s a shift in consciousness happening that’s moving people into their own energetic integrity; living life in alignment with their heart and spirit.

How we live, what we choose to do, the relationships we foster, and even the work we do are all being assessed these days for how aligned they are with our deepest truth; how they support us in moving forward in our own spiritual evolution and what we do right here, in our everyday lives.

The idea of alignment soothes the soul. Yet understanding what is in agreement with us — the right thing to choose — is often a sticking point for people. I see this all the time in my work. People know what they don’t want but have a whole lot of confusion around what is desirable… and even more so, what’s truly aligned.

How do you know what is truly aligned with you?

The other day, someone asked me why I thought a project I had started fell flat. And I shared how I realized I was doing things that lived up to some idea outside of me; a point of reference my dad held that I’d never accomplish what I really wanted to.

I had deferred my own knowledge about myself to his assessment for so long, it had become not only a belief of mine but a deeply woven external reference point that I had to extract myself from to change the belief and start making more aligned choices that did work for me. Although at the time, my initial choice felt aligned because I was so energetically enmeshed in the energy of this point of view. There it is though. When our choices are not aligned, the bottom line is with our own inability — at the time — to recognize, choose, and live our own truth because we are energetically enmeshed in something other.

Energetic Reference Points.

I talk about energetic reference points in my work a lot. They’re those energetic stakes in the sand that we anchor to, that help us assess something or compare things to. These energetic reference points are like signposts, helping us to both understand, and relax into, how we move through the world.

Yet, when we’re working off an energetic reference point that’s external — stemming from outside of us and our truth — we’re actually working off of other people’s ideas, energies, and needs.

Our energetic sensors recognize what’s familiar to that referencing system. We’ll gravitate to what emotionally fits and feels aligned with that. We’ll use that external energy (a.k.a. information) as a source of reference to help us make decisions and understand things. We’ll tie our energy to that and let it influence our choices.

And, in the process, we often forget our own internal point of reference, which helps align us with what we want and need: our true story.

Confusion.

When you get your most confused, it’s because you’re working off of this external energetic reference point. Deep down, you know something is off… but what? You know this energetic signpost so well. You may have even been working off of it your entire life.

Yet this nagging need for alignment is still there. This inner conflict begins to play out between the need to find alignment and the energetic information coming from outside of you, fueling your process. You get lost in how to understand yourself and what you need.

It can be challenging to let go of working off of someone else’s energetic point of view — be that your family, society or someone who impacts you in some way. To do so, you have to let go of what has “externally” helped you establish meaning, and now find your original energetic signpost within yourself. You have to own up to what is you and stand in the power of that. Anchoring back into you.

Shifting back into your own internal energetic referencing, like anything, begins with awareness. You must first recognize that you are using someone else’s energetic universe and ideas to fuel your own decisions.

Next comes reconnecting to your own passions and ideas. You must claim your own truth, despite the fears of falling short in someone’s eyes, disappointing someone, feeling ashamed for choosing you, or any other myriad of healing that needs to happen to transform what has kept you from feeling safe enough to choose you in the first place.

And then, you must do the work of growing into the person you must be, to live your truth through what you do.

This isn’t about cutting cords. It would be really easy to think that perhaps you could just cut an energetic cord to someone (or their ideas) if their energy was connected with you. But that’s way too simple of an idea. Sorry. I really hate to burst the bubble on that concept.

If you are working off of someone else’s energy — their energetic reference point and not your own — it’s because you, for some reason, have not yet had the ability to recognize and claim your own truth. You have unconsciously deferred your energy and your choice to someone, or something, else.

To find alignment, you must first come back to you. You must first know yourself and be able to use that as your gauge for what feels aligned with you. The signs. You’ll know alignment when you feel ease and grace, but more importantly, you’ll recognize alignment when you establish your own internal energetic referencing system that guides you into choices that deeply resonates with your truth.

If you aren’t owning your truth and working off your own energy — and using that as your reference for what is real and right — alignment will allude and confuse you.

I love the phrase, “If a door isn’t opening, it’s not your door.” If things aren’t working for you, then there’s something that’s still out of alignment; there’s still some energy that you are using as your own source of assessing what choice to make, that is not your truth. Don’t keep randomly trying new doors. Find the means to do the inner work to assess where you are working off of some external reference point.

Shift back into you; claim you. Then, you — and energetically only you — can begin to choose what is aligned from a place of clarity and energetic integrity.

 

~via Wake-UpWorld.com

MATEO SOL: “6 Ways You Hinder Your Self-Growth Without Knowing It”

Our “self-esteem” is a very delicate illusion. We are so off-centered when it comes to locating the origin of our self-worth, that the smallest realization of an imperfection in ourselves can bring up all kinds of insecurities.

When a person begins working with their soul, they will start through self-exploration to gain energy, vitality, and clarity. They will also, however, notice the ‘shock’ of beginning to see their own unconscious selves and their deep inner fragmentation (e.g: all your sub-personalities).

These contradictions within ourselves that speak of who we truly are beyond the social and cultural conditioning in our lives, are humbling, but more importantly, they can also be disturbing. If we were to discover and consciously become aware of all these contradictions at once, the shock would be so great we would most likely go insane.

Our brains have a limited capacity to process all the intellectual and sensory information that we encounter at any given moment, and because of this the unconscious mind exists. In essence, the unconscious mind is a psychological “buffer” which is a part of the brain that stores all the unprocessed information the conscious mind can’t handle.

The unconscious mind works as a shock-absorber, and in psychology this is known as a “defense mechanism”. There are an infinity of defense mechanisms going on within us at any given moment, but these are some of the most common I’ve observed in our practices:

Innocent Bystander

One of the greatest hindrances in anybody’s journey of self-growth is to fool themselves into thinking they haven’t done anything wrong. This may be why the recovering addict’s first step is to acknowledge they have a problem. Most people live in denial or avoidance of exploring themselves because it keeps them from properly recognizing their more unsavory traits and capacities.

“The world is screwed up but I’m completely guilt free” is their basic outlook on life. They refuse to see the interconnection between their actions and lifestyle with the external world around them.

Innocent Critic

This defense mechanism is very similar to the Innocent Bystander, only this one avoids guilt by actively criticizing the world and people around them. Criticizing is our way of rebelling against society and wanting to find a way out, of wanting to be outside of the ‘herd’ while still feeling a sense of false participation.

Critical thought is a necessary instrument in any persons self-growth. But often these “critics” use critical thinking as way of boosting their ego, to feel smarter than the ‘herd’ who haven’t realized what the critic has. Unfortunately, noticing what’s wrong with the state of affairs of the world isn’t enough unless you actively apply a solution to the problem. It’s the essential difference between the paths of self-discovery and self-understanding.

Suppression

Unquestionably, a major obstacle in living a fulfilling life to the maximum of your potential is your inability to be authentic to yourself (it’s the key element in Self-Love). All too often we live with an inner tension of controlling desires that we fear will be socially unacceptable. Let’s say you like a movie or a song that you know your friends don’t like, or maybe you are attracted to someone you know everyone will disapprove of, so you suppress that feeling.

The suppression won’t make the feeling go away, in fact, what happens is that you might be so good at suppressing the feelings that your unconscious mind learns to switch between your authentic self (“I like this person or thing”) to your false sub-personality (“I don’t like the person or thing anymore”).

In the end, the unconscious defense mechanism of “suppression” is protecting you from experiencing confusion as to whether you like something or not by jumping from one extreme to the other. Not only does suppression hinder your self-growth, but it can also contribute towards emotional, psychological and physical repression resulting in a host of sicknesses.

Repression

Repression differentiates from suppression in one important way. While suppression is initially a conscious process of having a desire and learning to avoid or ignore is, repression is an entirely unconscious process.

For example, you might have had a traumatizing experience as a child that unconsciously affected your feelings towards whatever the experience involved. This unconscious defense mechanism basically serves to protect you from feeling pain or other difficult emotions connected to the memories of what is being repressed.

Sometimes, religious beliefs or social conditioning can be so strong that desires that would normally be consciously suppressed (such as sexuality for instance), become automatically unconsciously repressed. You don’t even become aware of what exactly were the desires of your original authentic self, and this makes you completely out of touch with your true self. This self-denying defense mechanism makes it very difficult to learn and cultivate Self-Love.

Reactive Extremes

In psychology the technical term is “reactive formation”, and this is something you’ll observe everywhere. The nature of the unconscious mind is that it requires absolute certainties — it needs to see the world in black or white. There is no grey, or “in between”.

Many people who had a very strict religious upbringing for example, grow older and become disillusioned with the dogmatic ideas they’ve been taught. These people unconsciously find atheism a very attractive option, and become fanatical anti-God advocates, almost dogmatically. Another example of a reactive extreme is the person who finds it difficult to deal with, or understand, other people, and as a reaction decides to become a hermit and go live in the mountains.

Going to reactive extremes can also be illustrated in the case of sour grapes (or the false pretense that we don’t care for something we really do care for, which can be illustrated in the Fox and the Grapes fable). In this situation, our unconscious mind realizes that we are fixated on a certain topic so it protects us by going from one extreme to the other, e.g. from love to hatred.

Blameless Victim

I’m sure we’ve all come across an angry victim of life, someone who blames other people or the world for their difficulties. But everyone uses blame as a defense mechanism to some extent. In truth, what we’re defending ourselves from is our own responsibility for dealing with the unpleasant experience we’ve been given.

To indulge in blame is to give up personal responsibility and mentally delegate it to someone else, convincing ourselves that we are not responsible for the state of our lives, instead blaming it on some “outside force”. The blameless victim mechanism blocks us from seeing clearly just how we are contributing to our own suffering.

Essentially, the blameless victim is one of the fiercest protectors of our ego. It causes us to feel that we’re never failing ourselves, or that we lack the maturity or strength to come to terms with the reality of the situations we’re confronted with. Whatever happened is not evidence of our own inadequacy, but of someone else’s.

Have you observed any defense mechanisms in yourselves or in others? Let me know in the comments below!

 

~via Wake-UpWorld.com